5 days of summer // ENTER PORTUGAL
It's 18 degrees celsius here and really fucking hot regardless and this is the lightest temperature that there is for now tomorrow it's gonna be +25c or something like that I have no fucking idea which way I'm going from first order of business is to go to the hotel and uhh I could get there in 10 mins by taxi but fuck that shit, no way I'm gonna use it now I'm gonna walk now, an hour's hike to live and breathe this city a little bit it's gonna be a shorter day anyway uhh gotta make use of all of it need to eat and go to sleep early and stuff and tomorrow we're gonna ride some motorcycle :D fuck it's so hot that I had to change my clothes went to a gas station's piss-stained wc changing everything on the floor with bare feet and shit all the old clothes now smell like piss ...probably my backpack as well whatever, it's so fucking hot that I had to do it, else I would swelter like crazy alright we're here at the hotel what does a Finnish man do first thing he gets there? well he takes a shit Alright, so.. went to the hotel watched a few vids there to see what they look like and uhh thank god I did because I bought a 100e media mod in short basically meaning that it has an external microphone attached to it costs 100e and the quality is absolute dogshit imagine, I have to wing it now with the default mic because the quality is so fucking bad I spent 100e and it goes to waste for nothing for fuck's sake, such bullshit anyway uhh now we're gonna go to a place called Castelo de Jorge let's go see what kinda place that is supposedly a castle (cringe insider jokes not worth translating) Just went past a pizzeria that had pictures of pizzas which looked exactly like the one from the youtube vid "Mestre da Pizza" I just fucking can't, I don't want to film it but it looked fucking terrible literally like a copy of it unbelievable look no fucking sense in their heads bombing a fucking van what has he done? really fucking weird That's a really fucking big seagull right there proper alpha look jesus fucking christ the rest have no business taking his food Getting some small flashbacks there's an escalator next to the stairs though but we're not gonna use em we're gonna go through all the fucking uphills, stairs, hills, MOUNTAINS don't give a fuck, fuck. we gon go past this shit regardless of flashbacks and ptsd idgaf we go through all fuck the system doesn't feel like anything anymore seriously whatever this really does pale in comparison to everything else so far doesn't feel like anything sheesh ok well.. very minorly out of breath, not really that much people scared of heights would be unable to walk past this really fucking narrow you could slip on the cobblestone insert cringy insider jokes it's cool that I can say whatever the fuck I want that's why I want to speak Finnish to all of you english-speaking viewers who cry about me speaking an extinct language ..here's the reason. alllright that kinda castle really fucking cool time's 19:29 already gotta slowly waddle back tomorrow's a new day a lot more content but of course now I came here so late, so at least I got to see at least one place - - wait a minute, which way did I need to go ? ... got to see at least one place and now gonna walk back, eat something and sleep long ..and then.. motorrrcycleee tourrrr PORRRRTO SINTRRRA Aight... ate some empanadas Oh my fucking god I forgot.. ..just as I started to record I forgot to fucking pay... pay for my food
so the fucking cook had to run after me and call out hey sorry but you didn't pay luckily the people are so chill here that they legit don't mind at all they are just so god damn nice and polite here so they're like.. "life happens, don't worry about it" sheesh also gotta say that this gopro is hot garbage looks like I gotta film a lot with my camera now because it has an unbelievably bad battery so don't expect a full 4k experience some footage will be a bit grainy / blurry I took a taxi back to the hotel and it was the worst fucking driver I have ever had in my life so far he doesn't know traffic rules stops in the middle of the road or runs red lights I have google maps open where I show the address of the hotel regardless, he feels the need to stop the car multiple times to ask the locals for help something like 4 times in total and then I have google translate open as well, because he doesn't speak English ...and he doesn't understand what's being said to him EVEN THOUGH IT'S ALL TRANSLATED TO PORTUGUESE (WITH VOICE AND ALL) and he doesn't even know how to end the taximeter! and and uhh runs the red lights so somebody hits the horns so he drives over the speed limit next to him, and starts to mad dog him trying to start trouble and shit completely oblivious to the fact that he's in the wrong jesus fucking christ for real Had to stop at a gas station not once not twice but three times three times! to charge my fucking gopro so I can get some kind of footage so uhh I've lost a ton of content but what can you do ? gotta go with what I got so it's kinda like the video is in my head or for my eyes only unfortunately you can't see it now but every time I stop somewhere, I'm going to film with the camera now it's pretty difficult.. ..have to actually raise it up a fuckton normally it's here but now have to keep it somewhere like here have no kimbal for this but yeah, look at this btw, there was some really weird dude behind me lying at the bushes as I was filming myself I think he puked there at the back a proper home bum kinda looks like Mikko ( a guy you don't know ) as a matter of fact oink oink sheesh that kinda... fuck?
a lot of riding today like a fuckton a little bit of rest now That's a good example a dude runs like a squid riding without any gear like 150km/h at least, in the city center surely it can be heard in the video So fucking retarded, these people.. so fucking embarrassing, for real, so fucking embarrassing oh fuck kinda tempted to go in but it's not local food insert hard to translate finnish jokes (lazy to even try) Now it's literally as if I'm at Esplanade ( a park at Helsinki ) I mean look at this for real it's like turning to the right, I'd be heading towards the ferry harbor and on the left, there'd be boutiques ( obviously there are ), and hotel Kämp like.. it's just a longer version of it, a backrooms version spanning across for like 2km feels kinda endless really fucking weird hey now I think I got it on video even! turned my camera on, and literally at the same time, a guy behind me says (with bad english) : "you want coke? " not sure if you can actually hear it though really shameless! *bonk* walking here, turning off camera, and immediately the first thing that happens literally as I turn off my camera he asks "you want some coke? you want some weed?" so you gotta keep saying "no thank you bro" they're persistent they keep up with you for a bit now I see another squatter in front of me he's probably gonna ask also, if I want some ( he didn't fyi ) btw I did some SECRET POLICE WORK regarding the drug laws via google if it really is legal to use them like it's claimed but uhh possessing it if you have under 5g and it's for personal use is legal so there is a loophole which enables it selling is not legal, but buying... hmmm well technically yes because it's bought for personal use, 5 grams regardless, it's one of the least using countries in Europe you would think that it's the opposite, but no no no not at all you can really only see ordinary people there as you walk at the normie places ok well it's the same pretty much everywhere in EU but the dopefiends only come out at night and they're at the more sketchy places where a tourist isn't supposed to be at anyway I guess (example of a "more sketchy" place where i walked) now I've fucking seen it all lol junkies were directing traffic! what the fuck I walk by and then take a gander and see a junkie do like this like this and like that and this etc etc etc doesn't let some driver get past, walking towards it woah, a lot of piss on the ground walks towards the car and stops other cars like this and that one car had to put on reverse because obviously he doesn't want to hit him wtf and he wasn't the only one there was another and a proper clan that were eyeballing people was it like some fucking distribution point? or what the fuck was going on fuck I'm a celebrity look sheesh god damn I've made it red dot, Henry is here that's what it means obviously I'm world-fucking-famous sheeeesh I don't see anyone else's name on the billboard only mine so that means I'm the best dude in the world, clearly I'm a fucking god I'm a god! OH SHIT LOOK, IT'S THE COPS! BUT WHAT'S THERE? MORE COPS, COPS OVER THERE! some random insider jokes in betweewn etc Gotta say that at the beginning when I used the gopro with the stick and filmed whatever randomly I thought to myself, "what the fuck am I doing?" but look here I'm walking in the crowds, and nobody gives a flying fuck it was all in my head definitely going to keep this filming technique it's really cool, filming whatever the fuck I want and just walking everywhere just really fucking annoyed about the fact that I got some good content, but it's completely ruined sound-wise because my brains were fried at this point, so I kept talking about stupid incoherent shit that made no sense sorry, but no content for that unfortunately but yeah, if I drank, I would drink here hella good vibes if somebody comes to visit this country, this is the place for sure can highly recommend unfuckingreal I'm looking for a taxi, one taxi there is no taxi people everywhere, but no taxi nooo taxii where can I get a taxi? give me a god damn taxi for real (first taxi was full, didn't take footage, sadge) now I saw a 2nd taxi, I wave to him, like this, yo he waves back, and drives away and then I saw a 3rd one, and it was also full so I wave to him also like this and he points at the backseats implying that it's full as well fuck what a fucking asshole the 2nd one was! who does that? like waves at you heeeeeyyy whats uuuppp yoooo 2nd and last day riding the bike and soon I gotta return it but before that I gotta go to a place called Comporta at South Portugal You'll see soon that the views change pretty dramatically compared to yesterday and from there, heading back before the evening when I unfortunately gotta return it back can say that I'm gutted as fuck about it it was such an amazing bike, like no other some day I will buy that model for myself, beyond a shadow of a doubt that's for sure That feeling you get when you sit on the saddle of your bike, and start to ride forward that emotional state is completely indescribable your shit can be all fucked up you can be in a very bad place mentally whatever kind of stress or concerns in your life none of that matters for fuck all when you ride there is nothing but the road in front of you, and the sky as your limit and I can say that I've missed this feeling for the last 2 days (my bike got stolen :'c ) Nothing can replicate this Maybe I'll go get some ice cream? God fucking damnit I was supposed to go to Troia runas Romanas There's some kind of Roman Empire-era ruins but fuck... it's closed til 14:30, since the employee is gone for lunch til then so I'm shit out of luck and time now I have to turn back now fuck fuckedy fuck fuck I found a workaround for the gopro So I got the selfie stick it has a battery inside it which charges the gopro but for the first day, it didn't do it, because the battery was improperly positioned so it didn't do it at all so I thought it was only for the stick but knowing that, I can charge it every time I stop somewhere for example if I stop for some tea or coffee so I can charge it in the meanwhile through the stick then alles klar, all good I should be able to record everything relevant now except now the SD-card space is running out, lol always something wrong that's just how it is, practicing with new equipment gonna be better for the next video at least kinda nervous about how it will look like with some full hd, maybe some with my phone as well and then this gopro we shall see what it'll be like I guess it was actually a good thing that I didn't get to go to the ruins only because I had only 10 minutes left to return it when I did it and I had to stop at 3 different gas stations, because they didn't take foreign cards, had some really weird system so I was in a really fucking hurry to return it had it gone past that time, it would've been immediately reported as missing / stolen, and I'd have gotten a hefty fine if the cops saw me anywhere so... fuck.
Regardless, I believe that the feeling of euphoria riding this bike reflects upon the viewers as well even if one had not even rode one before and uhh I can highly recommend getting an A-card (finnish license for motorcycle) and to try it out can guarantee you will not regret it, that's completely certain pretty good condition can't feel anything around this area ok here it's only a bruise, but this here is just swollen with liquid sheesh forgot to go check the fucking elevator yesterday at comercia de plaza but I'm gonna go there now for sure not gonna walk the same fucking distance this time, no way gonna take either a taxi or metro probably a taxi because I have such limited time here so using the public transport is kinda shit just gotta go see it quickly, eat something and tomorrow we're gonna go to Sintra and the whole day spent there and what remains after that, gonna check out the things I've still yet to see Forgot my fucking camera back at the hotel so all the footage I'm getting is now with the gopro no zoomed or longer distance footage now what can you do though anyway, going to the elevator now and that's specifically one of those places where you should have a proper camera with you so you can get some zoomed in photography obviously but no, fuck does even this show properly? maybe barely but man dis some bullshit so I wanted to go to the elevator, and I can't.. all for fucking nothing lights on and everything, and there is no access at this time what the fuck does this mean, for real? Same place as yesterday night and uhh the difference is literally night and day ehehehehehehehe I'm so fucking funny, right? but for real, this looks completely different Like you would expect, like an idiot could as well but what I'm trying to say here is uhhh I don't mind walking past, and go to another direction because you can really see the contrast difference how different the vibes can be at night / day what I'm gonna do now is walk to the hotel, the full hour, and we shall see what we see on the way Let's eat, watch, wonder, etc etc Really proper fucking place now they have like so much choco frito, pica pau, tapas, prego, bifana, hamburgers, bowl de acai thank you, thank you very much! Obrigado! some beer took a prego, because I've always wanted to eat one, fucking finally I get to. Sheesh! Oh shit Ladies and gentlemen, prego. prego, however you spell it oh fuck one of the best sandwiches that I've ever had and I'm not exaggerating it was really, really, really good A tip for everyone don't plan your trip too much those who have traveled more than me probably know this already but this is how you find all the cool places you just walk somewhere without a destination and then you just find places sheesh again some uphill, for once it's not really that bad now but constantly slowly been going up here but yeah was whining about all the places for activities being closed today but apparently in Portugal, it all transfers to places like this so it doesn't really matter you just gotta find the proper places and then.. alles klar, so to speak
PTSD intensifies oof constant uphill flashbacks not to vietnam but uphills Exactly, that's what I'm fucking talking about! who? ME! and only me! Satan. I know, that you know, that I know, that I am Henry so who the fuck is the other Henry? there is no other Henry. only me Satan.
Fuck. bla bla bla inside jokes again I was warned that I should come here very early like at 07:00 it's full even during the weekdays at early morning, at offseason long fucking lines already I didn't expect it to be this popular, though didn't do my research so this is what you get luckily the lines move pretty quickly for fuck's sake needed to buy a ticket separately that was to the side of the line when I'm almost getting inside now.. with these, I can get in and we go to the back of the line once again which is way longer than before fuck yeah first stop, palacio nacional de pena we go here first it takes about 30 mins to walk up there and after we've seen this, we go to the castle let's go see, once again. now I can safely say that it's probably gonna be pretty steep, maybe gonna get winded up a bit there's all these fucking samsonite morons, like a fuckton of them, who take these tour guides I mean, nothing wrong with that, if you want one, you take one but fuck, they block all the fucking paths here so you gotta circle around them ...middle of the path, smh standing like statues there stopping to stand there like every minute then they're all like woooow oooh aaah oooh okaaayyy pssshhh, fuck Some dude started flexing smoked some tobacco while speedwalking uphill and so I slowly passed him he stopped to breathe coughing his lungs out how fucking embarrassing is that ? to flex with something like that look at me, look how fast I'm going up while smoking a cig That's the Pena palace now kinda surprising actually, that it wasn't that much higher I thought it would be really fucking high up there but I guess it was the castle instead had a really jip happen just now so there was a line for 10 and 9:30 separately and uhh I was first in the line for 10, but then jumped to 9:30 when I saw it was moving better so I was like oh ok this is probably for the guided tours, this later one, so w/e but when it was my turn to hand over the ticket to get inside the ticket inspector said, "sorry, this is for 10'o clock so you have to go back." so then I start pretending that I'm a stupid tourist when I realize that oh fuck, the lines are aaallll the way to the back, like really fucking far back by now so I pretend and act all like uuuhhh ooohh uhhhhhhhh durrrrr where am I supposed to go, what do I need to do , I don't know anything so a guide comes to me and says it's ok, just wait here AND SHE GUIDES ME DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF THE ENTIRE QUEUE I'M LITERALLY THE FIRST IN LINE NOW Everyone is stabbing me with their eyes by now of course and I'm all like... yeah sorry guys I had no idea, I don't know, I was placed here and stuff but hey in my defense, if I'm placed there, there is no fucking way I'm gonna give that up sometimes you gotta be the asshole to get ahead in life fortune favors the brave that's just how it is I mean, fuck man I just stand there, acting all bummed out and shit but fuck dude, I won so much fucking time doing this, NOT ON PURPOSE BTW SHEEEEESH I FUCKING FORGOT TO INCLUDE CASTLE MOORISH FOOTAGE COMPLETELY FROM THE VIDEO SO NOT GONNA TRANSLATE THIS PART BECAUSE IT'S IRRELEVANT FML UNCLE HANK, UNCLE HANK ! WHY DID THE PENA PALACE HAVE SUCH ISLAMIC AESTHETICS TO IT ? Weell, Henry will tell you, if you can hold your horses for one fucking second and keep your fucking mouths shut. You fucking whippersnappers.
So unequivocally, during 1100s, uhhh, Portugal was mostly occupied by muslim warriors and they obviously wanted to live like lords, of course, so they took a lot of slaves and servants so they forced them to build them all this shit you see now big, huge temples and palaces where it's very comfy to be in finnish inside jokes here, nothing to see here now this just got interesting, wtf ? pretty fucking cramped up here fuck man, these are just built different no chance walking with someone coming the other direction simultaneously had to come down multiple times while trying and there's this upper outlook/outpost w/e something like 20 fucking people crammed up in there together took forever to go down one by one we stood there with dicks against other's asses, getting flashbacks to tokyo trains and in Seoul, I took the 6 hour train where I had to stand and be completely hugging against other people -- kinda the same vibes I understood wrong the inverted tower, the hole in the ground it's also part of the place whatever the place was called palacio de regalia (wut?) or whatever it was... regaleiro? it all belongs to this and is located here and it's kinda misdirecting, because the tower I was at was called Torre da Regalia... regareiro? What the fuck was it called? Regaleiro, I think it was it has a pretty similar name, since it's also a tower, but it's just an inverted one so let's see if we can find it imagine, for real people actually lived here this is literally like from something like game of thrones, westeros, king's landing exactly like game of thrones there was probably a lot of plotting and conspiring happening here all kinds of fucking things as they walked past these bushes and in these parks and yards etc living sweetly and royally while the worker slaves break their backs for them and it wasn't an inverse tower, I don't know where the fuck I read it from but it's Poco Iniciatico, Initiatic Well I don't know if that's some kind of a ritualistic well then -- thinking out loud what the meaning of initiation is in this case for finnish viewers -- Idk, I don't fucking know anything anymore I googled a lot of shit, and it's all shit information places that are supposed to be open, are closed, and those that are closed, are open all the information is fucked whatever this is pretty much checked out by now dunno where the fuck I should go next there should be at least 2-3 other places still the clock is 14:32, got plenty of time to check stuff out can really make the day fly here, if you want can really recommend, if you come here, to be here as early as possible about 07:00 is a good time to be here. Breakfast and 07-08:00 whereabouts you'd be here because there are really fucking long queues and then, reserve a couple of hours for it. I'd say at least 5-6 hours. In that time, you can see quite a lot I've seen plenty enough for now can go see something else now, since I have a lot of time left as a matter of fact, I reserved the entire day for this so let's go check out everything that I can find but this regalio, whatever the fuck it was, this was done unless there's something cool that comes accross now but I believe this is done Let's go eat at a place called Tulhas kinda getting hungry it's the oldest restaurant in this village don't know how old, but..
ok, 1982 it says there I thought something like 1800s idgaf whatever I don't know what the fuck it is, but I ALWAYS FORGET TO RECORD MY FOOD but now I have to say that I regret it a lot because IT WAS SO FUCKING GOOD that it was like no other by far THE BEST CLAMS I'VE HAD there was a clam chowder dish, made local style jesus fucking christ, SO GOOD, like god fucking damn probably have a picture of it somewhere that I can insert to here ( and that worked well, lol ) I don't fucking know but, the best clam chowder I've ever had in my life, no kidding a place called Praia da Ursa and I was fucking lucky, asking the taxi driver, where the stop is if I didn't ask him, I would never be able to get a taxi from here from fucking nowhere luckily, I was able to make a deal with him just gonna text him and he comes to pick me up so apparently no buses or anything come here, only way to come is by a car/motorcycle/scooter etc etc etc hopefully it's worth, at least looking at the pictures it was really fucking nice got the feeling that maybe I should have taken swimwear with me, lol let's see if there's a lot of people, maybe I can go to some corner and go commando would be really fucking cool to go swimming but I mean, I'm going to a beach without swimwear, wtf am I thinking? This is so breathtaking.. words can't describe how beautiful this really is It's like from a fucking movie still got goosebumps jesus fucking christ got so many goosebumps that I need to take a shit do you guys know the feeling ? like when you browse a movie catalogue, and there's many good movies there and you can't decide which one to choose from or at the candy store, so many good choices or you're at some pleasant place.. I don't know what the fuck that is, but I really need to take a shit at least for me that's what happens idk what the fuck is that about? I'd like a scientific explanation for it Last day, and there isn't much time left got only time to go visit one last place, and after that to the airport and actually after flight, almost immediately going to work now afterwards, I can say that was pretty fucking tired but it was still worth it lol in retrospective, it's kinda funny how much fucking content I had to cut out from the video just because I filmed myself, and talked without any kind of filter, things that would not see any kind of daylight whatsoever at youtube People who know me, know what I mean, lol, not gonna say anything else about that matter but fuck, I'm so fucking annoyed about it, but what can you do however, it's a good lesson for the future, that going to different places, maybe I ought to think what I'm about to say before rolling the camera but I hope that the things I managed to keep in the video aren't too dry Ok so the last place is here really fucking cool even though I'm not a christian, it's still a pretty cool monument it's called "Cristo Rei" I'm gonna go to the front, and get some good footage of it There's one like this in Brazil also not sure if it's exactly the same but this is pretty high up there also pretty high place I think it's much higher up though, with a proper steep cliff and you probably can't even go there? but this one you can see from up close gotta take good footage of it and hang out here for a bit, and the off we go to the airport and back to... the fucking gray everyday life
to go look at fuckfaced people who can't even smile, or greet others bitter and jealous to everything and everyone "WHY DOES HE HAVE THAT ? IF HE HAS THAT, I HAVE TO STOMP HIM DOWN DGJKHSAGKJSAHG" It's so fucking Finnish.. there's that saying someone will pay 100e for neighbor... I mean 200e pays 200e just so the neighbor can't get 100e it really is fucking true, always has been and always will be fucking shithole of a country so fucked about having to go back anyway.. to these pictures, to these moods good time to end the video and kinda surprised how much you can actually see in 5 days only will come back here for sure, to different places, at least going to Porto and renting a motorcycle for more days Saw a lot, but there's a lot more to see also but regardless Thank you all for watching This took an unbelievable effort to make It's been a much bigger project that I've took on compared to the other videos Every day working on it for 5-10 hours at least, for nearly 2 weeks ( actually more like 3 ) I kinda have the feeling, that the early content of this video was kinda dull and bland where I came from the airport to here be that as it may it was quite an undertaking, hope that you like it let's see where we're going next time it's possible that there's going to be a new video quite soon actually who knows anyway to these moods, thank you to everyone, to the next video, ciao!