Episode 1 The Bipolar Blender
okay well good morning gentlemen turn the blender on turn the blender on welcome to the bipolar blender all of our what are they called what are podcast people called potties potties what do you call someone that listens to a podcast besides i do podcasts are so popular i don't i don't think it's like that anymore you know what i mean everybody everybody has a thing though anyway what were you talking about the idea that you had the for a little segment that you were talking about the scenarios ryan's scenarios there you go i think i think we'll that'll be later in the show but first let's enter guest star introduce our guests here or wait host or these people um gentlemen go ahead take it away who are you well i think i think it's only proper for for you to i think whoever whoever's idea this was i think it was your doing that kind of brought us all together so why don't you just and keep yeah i think also keeping in mind the fun of this will be sort of letting things go as the show progresses so like i don't you don't have to like you know we don't have to i'll take it away all right if we want to just bow our heads in a moment of prayer that's that's a great way to introduce yourself again we just lost half the audience um yeah let's um so the bipolar blender was a byproduct of uh multiple decades of drug use and a friendship that just wouldn't quit so here we are boys you know what else i think is is also cool that i should that i was thinking about the other day like you know i won't obviously get into this more in the future but the idea that you know greg is not here but that his brother is here who's dylan obviously i think that that i think that that's just um i i don't want to call it poetic because it's such a douchey thing to say but i think it's uh it's um i don't even know what the word for it is but it's cool it's [ __ ] cool maybe you don't use that word enough anymore it's [ __ ] cool cool in a douchey kind of way yeah i really i really do feel um sort of honored or whatever and dylan and i haven't had any sort of you know communication for for a long time so this this will be cool to do this uh you know and to have it be recorded maybe somebody will listen to it and laugh at it or something i don't know hopefully yeah all right well i'm just gonna slightly introduce you just so people might know who you are the guy on the top my top left there that's chef chris purdue he owns his own business um he's actually gonna sponsor this show eventually he'll be one of our uh somebody's throwing that out there you should pay for some of this with all that chef buddy the idea just just the simple idea that you think that that's even like anyways everyone thank our supporter for an answer here right there chris purdue and then we got the amazing dirty homeless man dylan jared on the bottom like always on the [ __ ] bottom talented musician songwriter hung like a [ __ ] horse dylan [ __ ] jarrett i'll start rumors he's actually got a camera i'll i'll say that the the the guy who introduced us uh that that would be ryan uh ryan hardy uh and i you know if if anyone's listening and and needs any kind of context ryan and i uh have been friends since sixth or seventh grade uh and then uh of course uh dylan has been friends with us since about the same time i would from memory but since i was in like sixth or seventh grade i met y'all yeah yeah so ryan and i met uh in middle school uh and friended greg which didn't happen until what i think high school right like you and i met greg in high school um through my brother yeah yeah which is which is which is dylan's brother so greg me greg and ryan uh were sort of best friends through high school and of course being best friends with greg also means that you're friends with his brother you know so um you know and greg is obviously not with us anymore um wasn't anything it wasn't anything like you know it's not like it wasn't like a bruckheimer film and where were you like out in this like crazy sort of you know it's a very unfortunate car accident um but anyway that's just and and all this stuff will come out i just wanted there to be some kind of context to you know again if anyone if we get to the point where we when we when we have a podcast that people listen to and this is their introduction this is the first thing you know i uh you have to you got to grab them and pull them in somehow i don't and just one side note i've actually done intravenous drugs with both of these gentlemen so yeah that's awesome that'll be the topic of a lot of things sir i'm sure it will speaking i don't know it's gonna help out chris business big time yeah that's the other thing that's the other thing this this right here might not ever even need to as far as the visuals and like like i was saying like i don't you know i got the business i got i don't i don't know if this will be like don't worry my name is my my name is and i live here and i just hit can i come in your home and cook food for you and your children don't worry about it my friends don't live in this state that's the other thing is that i you you can't you don't have much on me because you don't you know you you you're far away there buddy so anyway um topics man did you boys bring topics go ahead dylan uh i did not break whether you do not yeah i don't whether you did or not i don't mean like speak on it yeah no i don't have many topics uh what'd you just last night you sack of what what did you do last night you sack of [ __ ] that's always a great topic what do you do dylan what are you doing right now i just i literally just woke up ryan's call literally just woke me up nice have you all been up for a while yeah this is like my third cup of coffee i dealt with a screaming four-year-old and at some point i'm pretty sure i punched the wall i cried for a little while yeah i don't i i i i was up at about four because i don't i have this wonderful affliction these days where i sleep for like five hours possibly a little bit more and then i wake up and i and then there's no going back so if i go to bed at 10 i'm gonna be up at four at the latest so anyway so i've been up for a while and and i have you know a screaming son and a crazy daughter you all are in the beginning stages dude yeah wait so that teenage year gets everyone around yeah what's layla layla is like [ __ ] how old is that 14 15 14 she's about to be 15. how old were you when you had her that's since [ __ ] 19 you were 19 yeah good god see that's not that far from normal that's not that's not that's not like crazy you know what i mean yeah back then i would never have wanted to be you like when i was 19 i wanted one had a kid but now i'm almost like god i wish i would have had a kid when i was 19 because that [ __ ] would be about out the house we'll pretty much be over yeah it would be over yeah you're not paying bills get the [ __ ] here yeah um all right chris what's up what's what's up what's on your mind today man what's what's ruffling your feathers in the world of [ __ ] well so this is going to be yeah this is going to be a common theme right and and i want to and i mean that seriously it's funny huh but it is going to be a common thing for me it's just how it is um i don't necessarily anything that i bring to the table like between the three of us is i'm not necessarily um trying to start like a debate with with dylan or try to start a debate with you ryan like that's not gonna be the uh the reason for any of this right like i'm not trying to come in here to try to change your minds if now will i and and have i debated it with other people yeah of course but anyway so the stuff that i bring to the table is i'm not i just want you guys to i just want you to know that i'm not trying to like you know change your mind or or convince you of anything there's enough people in the world whose side are you on yeah if you don't change my mind by the end of this podcast i [ __ ] quit i don't want my life are you with russia or ukraine me you asked me i don't think god who knows but anyway no i that that that of course is a big deal but i the the stuff that's on my the stuff that has sort of taken over my thoughts for pr for primarily that have been you know i have never really been into politics i just haven't until um you know about a year ago or so and and there's gonna be if there's say there's 20 people listening 19 of them are about to roll their eyes and vomit when i tell you what i'm going to say because they're so tired of hearing about it but you know the the the january 6th thing and all the stuff that surrounds that to me is so fascinating i find it just absolutely intriguing that um that whoever you think it was if it was this person that a group of people uh went to the capitol building and wanted to go inside and and and literally were rubbing their [ __ ] on the walls and and and wait there was feces being rubbed on walls yeah well i haven't i and again this is all from a media that we've all grown up and not been able to trust but but the pictures and the videos we've all seen and that and and that's all that i'm saying when i saw that happen i'll never forget where i was the moment that i saw that footage for the first time and you also got to remember i live 20 minutes from there like that's like right up the street from me so um it was it was it was just jo it was just crazy to see um and so that event and then all the [ __ ] that has surrounded it uh since then to me is just fascinating you know the the the stuff that led up to it the actual event and then the stuff that's happened after it um i just like i said i just think it's absolutely fascinating every aspect of it i find the idea that some people don't believe that the people there were who they say they were there's a big group of people and ryan and john i don't know how much you guys know about the event and if but i'm just gonna i'll just tell you what i've seen and what you know so there's people you know if if you watch the videos it's people holding trump flags and and you could you could say that 95 percent even more i could say that 99 percent of the people that i saw in those videos at least um were pro donald trump pro-republican pro-conservative and they were there to literally try to get mike pence to overthrow the uh the count for the electoral college which is basically a ceremony anyway it's not even an actual um it's basically a show right like it doesn't actually hold any value or any real uh relevance anyway i mean there were people that built they built gallows in the field and were and were chanting hang mike pence and there were people chanting they were inside the capitol building chanting we're coming for you nancy i mean like this this is his name she's the speaker of the house she's the she's the person that she's we can talk about that later she's a very very important person in congress she's the one who uh what does she say when she speaks well she slams the gavel on [ __ ] so she's the one who's in the big room when they build when they when they put a law or a bill and and to actually the one that puts me in prison yeah basically basic clock [ __ ] nancy but anyway yeah right but anyway the point is that like that whole event was just it was jarring to me and and um there there's just been so much controversy that surrounded it i i just find it fast so that and then you know uh donald trump is obviously to me a fascinating figure i i think that it's i think that it's so interesting just him and his whole being so um you know those are how is that possible how can someone so [ __ ] stupid get so many people [ __ ] riled up is that you are you that's a legitimate question like seriously every time i would like watch like that happening i mean i don't watch the news at all but i would see people like oh [ __ ] like trump [ __ ] jizz on my face [ __ ] knock my kids up like [ __ ] you're the what was it what was the thing he was like the next coming of christ at one point like [ __ ] just at one point there's still there he's still i mean he may be who knows i don't know very strong and and and and in huge parts of the country and in the world so anyway your question your question is how does he get elected well i think it i wasn't terribly into it like i said i've only waited wait wait my question is no i know how he got elected he's got money like if you have money you can [ __ ] become the president well yeah that's that that's a big part of it but because you have to campaign and that's millions and millions of dollars yeah but a lot of these people are using super pacs it's not necessarily allowed even to use their own money so they're fundraisers right like donald trump is a fundraiser that's what he is so yeah the rich electing the rich it's not yeah there's [ __ ] like i'm sorry your vote doesn't matter let's just do that i love what you're what you're saying is so right on what i find crazy is that i've been in a conversation with having that conversation with people for years but then all of a sudden somehow donald trump comes along and these people have been they think that he's like this since he's not a politician and since he's not a career politician he's just a trust fund baby uh corrupt corporate businessman that he's for some reason i'm getting off on a tangent i don't i don't want to get into a political deep in that [ __ ] tantrum you know i just wanted to that's that's where my head's at lately and um we can we can go into we can go into uh other parts of it um if you want but i i don't want this to become me rambling about uh trump for 30 minutes so unless you guys want to keep talking unless that's where you want to go with this but did you hear about uh all those [ __ ] fbi like the fbi infiltrated the january six [ __ ] did you hear about that yeah yeah yeah to help all those people get in there yeah there's video there's videos of it it's insane and that's what i'm saying it's fascinating there's there's so much that goes along there's so many the idea that that the cops were just like letting you know what i mean like just sort of in the beginning at least you know holding doors open and this time the other it's it's insane it's it's so crazy but but i tell you what the part that i find more fascinating than anyone and the thing that has gotten me more riled up than anything is the absolute denial of what happened and like you've got you've got people here let me tell you this i'll tell you a story this sums it all up right a guy named andrew clyde right who was on the senate floor the day this happened right there's video of him barricading himself you know on the other side of this door because these people are coming through they they they let the people in congress know so they're they're trying to get these people out and they're trying to get them safe there's video of andrew clyde he might be a georgia congressman barricading him and himself inside so that these people can't get to him who are armed and you know or were trying to chanting that they're trying to kill people whatever there's video of him doing that he goes on record and he's a registered republican believe it or not he goes on record uh to talk about what happened on january 6 and verbatim said that the people that were there at the capitol on january 6th were nothing more than a bunch of tourists so it's the complete deny it's the fact that there are there are republicans that are just completely denying this and trying to act like it wasn't a big deal that it was antifa that there was all this other [ __ ] trying to downplay it that's the part that i find even more fascinating than anything that the idea that there are people that are trying to say that it didn't happen and then it was yeah yeah yeah i i the idea that the party that's all about accountability and all about um you know admitting your wrongs and being a man and standing up for what you've done is just like blatantly denying um just just just basic facts um it had to stop the steel they had to they had to stop the steel and drain the swamp there's it's it's fascinating i find the whole thing how to do it it's just it's so interesting to me so um you know that's it's it's well i'll say this so like i think like as generationally i'm i'm currently a member of a community college where i'm learning a lot about history in my history 101 class that's great not a big deal it's not a big deal or anything i'm saying yeah i'm in college but so the history of the world like i mean every [ __ ] generation every century every [ __ ] there's a great war there's someone getting wiped off the [ __ ] map there's blah blah blah like it's [ __ ] non-stop people just kill people constantly right so here in america like it's literally we don't see that on american soil so the dumbest [ __ ] can like set off like a chain reaction because like we're blood thirsty [ __ ] we're like our species is like literally ingrained in violence so it can just be like the dumbest [ __ ] thing like stop the electoral steel like what the [ __ ] ever and people are gonna [ __ ] they're like this is an opportunity to go [ __ ] crazy let's go [ __ ] crazy yeah what was that [ __ ] um what was that concert the other day where like they wouldn't stop the crowd and like [ __ ] yeah what'd you say what was it grab a scott concert yeah like and the dude was just like i've got new nikes on [ __ ] it like let's murder these people like [ __ ] you like zero [ __ ] given and i'm not saying i mean [ __ ] if i was there who knows it's tragic showing those kids how to mosh pit but anyways what i'm saying is there we're at a stagnant time like there's no like people are wanting any reason and every reason to get out there and [ __ ] do something stupid we need to be like i mean people get stuck in their everyday lives you know like all three of us we all go to work for the most part [ __ ] do the family thing and [ __ ] like you know if i was out on the street and there was a mob people and they were getting all riled up and [ __ ] about to break some windows and go storm building i'd be like [ __ ] yeah let's [ __ ] storm the capitol like i don't even care what their beliefs are let's [ __ ] do something like [ __ ] i'm bored as [ __ ] you always hear that like you always hear that like a person is not a person that like the person is not you have to worry about it's the group of people that you have to worry about you know what i mean like one big mob very real i'm telling you man it's [ __ ] there's something in that man once you get people in numbers it's it's [ __ ] scary those people like individually the ones that did the capital ship walked up to them one-on-one be like hey man you want to storm the capital they'd be like oh yeah that sounds illegal yeah it's that mob mentality is fascinating you can put 20 000 people in the street yeah somewhere for anything it doesn't matter you'd be in the street writing and have no idea what you're writing about which i assume is the mindset that a lot of people find themselves in yeah and then you get a loot stuff and like steel [ __ ] tvs and [ __ ] microwaves and blenders everybody needs a blender and now that i've talked [ __ ] for a few hey hold on do you have a maybe we'll edit this out do you have a timer that shows you how much more time you have before it goes off uh we've gone we've gone 10 minutes and then i can just start another meeting it's just we can just go back into the next meeting or whatever i'll have an hour so at about 11 we'll have to but anyway i was just i just didn't want to like cut off in the middle of something no if it keeps us out that we can um that's where that's where my mind has been that's that's my i'm sure my wife is terribly tired of hearing all about it and yada yada so um anyway someone else if you tell your wife if she's tired of hearing you she can call me and i'll [ __ ] rhetoric to [ __ ] listen to you're disturbing you're a disturbing person i am i'm very [ __ ] [ __ ] no so ryan what's your uh were you what am i doing you guys want to pause and talk about our sponsors no we're where where have your thoughts been well ninja blenders is actually sponsoring we need a blender [ __ ] sponsor perfect it's a good idea you guys ever [ __ ] used a ninja they're amazing ninjas are [ __ ] vitamin a vitamix is like a vitamix is basically a restaurant grade ninja so go [ __ ] yourself we have new ones if you want to talk about you want to talk about restaurant equipment with me is that really where you want to go you want to come with me bro i'll go get my brochures i have them i got a kitchenaid in my pants right now beating my nuts around no but seriously where what's uh what's the deal what are you where are your thoughts okay well um y'all don't want to do ryan's scenarios should i play a game oh yeah at the end of this we need to vote who said the most white privileged thing you've heard on the show today sweet that's another segment that you're talking about yeah that's yeah at the very end of the show we all get one vote and we get a vote which one said the most white privileged thing you've heard all day i don't know that because then you just have to come up with something i don't want to see no no you gotta take notes during the show i've already listed no i know but you should have said this at the beginning of the show because i would have known that i was like it's ryan because he's in college i'm making i'll make notes perfect dylan that was it right there your your rant about college was the most white privileged [ __ ] i've ever heard wait wait i want to vote chris on that because his his excuse of i just don't know that's the most white privileged [ __ ] i've ever just now you're like i didn't know the show was starting you didn't tell me about it i was uninformed no one told me why we don't this is why we don't listen to all your [ __ ] ideas because they just turn into this like snowballing [ __ ] that never stops and it just that's a blender of ideas if you will no seriously what where's your what's okay so okay scenario time guys all right you all ready for the scenario of the day sure close your eyes everyone close their eyes jesus feeling your eyes are open shut your [ __ ] eyes and stop looking at me okay so i want you to picture this so you're you you're born a man right picture your genitalia cocking balls hanging there right jesus you grow up throughout your whole life and then you're like i have a penis it is what it is but then you start hearing all this stuff about you know my identity and who i am who i feel like i am are you feeling it you questioning yourself yet yeah i'm touching myself touching and questioning everyone questioning and touching themselves so you've decided to go ahead and get the gender reassignment this is you guys doing this now right this isn't me this is you guys doing this you're getting your gender reassignment procedure done right okay side note you're also on the swim team all right and as a male you didn't do so good on the swim team right you go through the surgery you get the estrogen you get all the treatments and everything you start contending in the women's swimming team and you're killing it you're smoking all the women how do you feel about yourself are you cheating or do you feel like you identify as a woman therefore you should be able to be white wait this me it said the meeting no longer has a time limit oh it's not oh cool yeah we're good okay well so who's gonna do you gonna go first dylan i split mine like a hot dog dude i just split it oh we already do it yeah all right well uh you have a vagina and you're on the swim team and you're literally killing it now i would not feel good no you think that's you no here's the thing hold on let me say the ques you gotta do you had to frame your question a different way if i've already cut my [ __ ] off and i'm swimming as a woman i obviously feel good about it the question is is it is it morally acceptable the question is do you feel good about beating the other women of course if you've gone through the process of course you feel good about that yeah i mean yeah i'm good with that i don't feel like that question is this the question is should a person be able to have gender reassignment surgery and then compete in the other in the other uh category of sports no but you're missing the point these are our scenarios it's not a question the literal but the literal answer to the question is of course i feel good about it have you ever go see the whole moral thing doesn't really stand up then does it like reality that's a great point that's a great point that's absolutely a great point that that what other people think shouldn't matter but what i'm saying is that the way you frame the question is all i'm saying is that the literal answer the question has to be that they feel good about it because they've if you here's the deal let me say this if you've gone through jennifer hold on here's another question if you've gone through gender reassignment surgery had your [ __ ] cut off are competing in the opposite sport and you win and you feel bad about it what the [ __ ] does that mean that's the that's the like what like why would you feel bad about it maybe i'm saying that right like you're winning you're [ __ ] winning so that's my i'm on that scenario that i've lived through multiple times in the shower where i tuck it between my legs and i'm like am i swimming like seriously i'm like in the gold medals around my neck and i'm like [ __ ] [ __ ] you [ __ ] what you [ __ ] gotta say about it let me let me say this and this is something that will obviously be edited out but if we're gonna this is great this is great but what i'm saying is that you've got to realize that if you go about this stuff a certain way that you're and and who cares if you do you don't care whatever you're gonna you're going to not necessarily piss off people but if you go about things in a certain way you're going to alienate a massive amount of people because you're going to come off or you're going to seem like you're a racist or a bigot or blah blah blah so i i i'm just i'm just putting that out there it's a practical way of thinking of things so what does racism have to do with gender reassignment i'm i'm just i'm just speaking in general terms i'm just saying because only white people can afford to cut their dicks off there you go yeah you can turn anything into a racial into a racial that's racially charged i'm just i'm being serious i'm not i'm not being a jackass i'm just saying that just just to to think about it you know people get offended by everything and i don't care about offending people but if we're trying to get this out and trying to get a lot of people to listen to it you know it just might be something you want to think about okay you know i'm clear so your vote chris was i feel good about myself competing as a woman in the women's swim team i hold on hold on how does the song go is there a song it's like i'm so excited and i can't yada yada yes i feel great about it it's fantastic um what about you dylan we gotta get rid of [ __ ] women's sports have you ever watched it it's awesome this is how we do it boys this is how we do it that's dylan that's perfect i that was perfect that was absolutely um right [ __ ] down yeah i'll cut my dick off right now it's so boring we don't have a whole lot going on i can i can make that happen well i definitely think now dylan's in the top running for the most white privilege thing by saying only white people have the money to afford to cut their dicks off oh god that's a that's rich that's rich white people white people rich um okay so we've covered july six wait no was that july january february was that this year god damn life is flying by that was 2022 wasn't it or was it 2021 that happened 2020 yeah 2020. that was three years ago two no it was two what day is this it was 20 21 the daylight savings happened already what happened right it was 2020 2021 right 2021 yeah okay i was about to say nothing really happened in 2020 that's worth any noting right yeah there's nothing nothing at all for like months dude yeah choice was just pretty much uh no nothing to note there and then yeah gender reassignment so you guys are all for it huh yeah i love it so when your kids come to you and say hey i'm already [ __ ] i'm already giving her testosterone every day dude they're already letting people it's already happening okay all all right good deal i'm glad we're so open if you're under 18 the parents are like i've heard so many stories unbelievable stories about parents letting children have surgeries and stuffed eyes yeah it's nuts dude who's really parenting who who who who who who swings the balls in the family after this we learn so much from our children the gift that keeps on giving insert cliche here your whole life is a cliche i'm a fake fraud i'm a [ __ ] fraud i don't know how to podcast what's your what's your deal dylan oh man what kind of burritos are they making today dude we got specials we got deconstructed asian tacos it's amazing where are you at uh some little [ __ ] called tierra oh i shouldn't say it you want death threats no that's cool that's uh that's good i miss working in a restaurant a lot i think it's the kind of thing where i miss it but i don't think i'd be able to do it again but i do miss it it's a lot of fun what this is actually the drugs yeah there's lots of boozes yeah i try i tried to go back to the restaurant after i gots over [ __ ] couldn't do it it wasn't anywhere near what it was when i was [ __ ] up like i i ended up being i ended up being a lot better when i got when i got out of that and i went and started working in tennessee like i've i've never been that successful in a restaurant ever yeah i i definitely i went back and it was just like the most [ __ ] hood restaurant i've ever worked at like i worked in atlanta and restaurants maybe that's like the one that i worked out here in tuscaloosa i literally saw like i'm not [ __ ] you at least five fist fights in the six months that i worked there and like multiple like [ __ ] death threats are the customers employees fellow cooks dude was walking down the line on a friday night [ __ ] you not with a tech nine showing his friends look what i just [ __ ] picked up i was like that's a [ __ ] uzi bro that's a [ __ ] like i mean that's i mean literally you could kill everyone on this line with that it was some [ __ ] like out of [ __ ] was that a [ __ ] not eastbound and down [ __ ] straight out of compton like check out my [ __ ] assault rifle that's incredible that was i mean i was aroused but but yeah it was a small line too like you know it was like very close together so like we had to like pass each other and the gunman kind of stuck me in the hip and i was like oh but yeah like i said that's a that was that was that's here in like tuscaloosa bum [ __ ] alabama yeah like people have manners in atlanta they'll leave the future in the parking lot you know i mean like [ __ ] god damn i'm trying to [ __ ] cook your steak mid-rare when you don't even [ __ ] know what mid-rare is it's like oh this is [ __ ] undercooked no [ __ ] mid-rare man it's a [ __ ] red bloody center deck of [ __ ] like i've got my thermometer right [ __ ] here that sounds like so much fun same medium [ __ ] say you want a [ __ ] medium that's great so how do you how far away do you live from brandon do you know um brandon is like like geography-wise probably like i don't know an hour away from me that's mentally mentally i probably live in a different galaxy than brandon and what you told me that's great well that's definitely going to have to be i'm not i will say this i love brandon and i uh have very different opinions on the stuff like that i was that i mentioned about you know january 6th and trump and stuff yeah the the the the great thing and i'm being dead serious when i say this is that brandon and i are on different worlds politically but like we still have great conversations um oh i love meeting brandon i love me from brandon dude but i just mean it's been a positive experience for me because but i will say this some of the stuff that he's some stuff he says i've seen it's like wow like it's you know but but i digress because you know nobody's nobody's yeah let's talk [ __ ] about dylan what are you doing yeah all right so all right so we got a little bit of time right since we're not on time meeting anymore yeah we got i got about 15 minutes i'm responsible um okay so show of hands who's been laid in the last week there's not sex in a week no no lord did you have no idea what it's like to have a [ __ ] one-year-old that running around that cannot it's it's not it's not i'll say this it's not due to any like underlying reason we just literally don't have 30 seconds to be away from our children it's 30 seconds all right well okay hold up in the last two months oh yeah i know i that i oh totally yeah like i said there's no underlying weird thing going on in my house aside from the fact that my son won't leave me alone for chris there are so many underlying weird things happening in your house but not none none that prevents clearance oh [ __ ] all right i gotta take your cut to the point how long has it been dylan give me a day over two years hear that ladies hear that ladies yeah this man needs you i did make out with a chick with herpes a couple months ago that'll hold you over right i mean that's enough to you know yeah generally uh i think she said both so he she actually told you yeah but that'd be good at least you're not half-assing anything that's that's yeah man when the opportunity's hot what's that restaurant life man herpes burritos adderall lots of lots of shitty cocaine yeah yeah how did lime come from they all line cooks like always just have to [ __ ] it's like it's no matter what they have it but it's just always like shitty shitty drugs i don't know i don't know tangent but yeah yes the busboys that's where the [ __ ] drugs are man you [ __ ] want some good drugs i'll the only reason why i was able to do anything decent after i got out of treatment was because the restaurant that i went to still to this day was the cleanest kitchen i've ever been in like i mean there were a few kids that like smoked weed maybe drank a couple beers after work but like there was none of that and it was it was i was very surprised very surprised yeah so the new generation is all about adderall well i mean ryan and ryan and i said the old generation is all about adorable dude ryan and i used to literally shoot shoot oxycontin in the basement of the restaurant that i worked that we worked at and we would go back upstairs and work we would choose like we did that [ __ ] like every day for a long time i've prescribed adderall by that doctor you introduced me to dylan adderall and [ __ ] xanax who prescribes adderall and xanax to somebody he was indian he was an indian man he couldn't even speak english barely he wears flip-flops like every day it's insane yeah i'd go in there just like completely like [ __ ] like face melted off my skull this was strictly a like under the table operation like you didn't he didn't prescribe them 100 bucks and you got your month like you're [ __ ] just opening it would he give you whatever you want they're all [ __ ] to tell you jackpot that doesn't mean that so lucky that i never got into that like scenario like pill mill type thing i never i don't know why but i never never made that show people blame trump but i think when the fda cracked down on oxycontin that's when america really i don't think people blame trump i'll say this i have a lot of debate i've never heard anyone blame the opioid crisis on [ __ ] trump that's great the decline the decline of america was because of trump i'm saying it's because they didn't let the opioid pain just play out you know like anybody free markets free anybody [ __ ] it uh so anyways yeah um we'll just want to uh we'll see here we're about well we got nine minutes i think that it's on on a serious note we're gonna have to figure out a way to not talk over each other yeah i like those things in there we gotta get those zingers in there yeah no i just yeah i mean like with with other kinds of audio but i mean like if you like the podcast that i listen to where there's more than or or even better the the the videos on youtube that i watch because i watch i watch a lot of podcasts on youtube if that makes sense and and and that's different because they're sitting in front of each other right and they know that they're not they don't have to so but for us to be on zoom we're going to have to figure out um i don't i don't know i don't know how that works um one thing will help is a good [ __ ] um wi-fi connection that'll like prevent lagging well also if we if we're if we're all wearing headphones and i'll have a microphone doesn't it like it like yeah it's good phone so it doesn't it feeds directly into your microphone and then into your uh earphones so there's no it deletes the problem from the actual recording device on the laptop yeah so that'll help um so like i said when uh when your private chef industry starts financing this [ __ ] titanic we will uh we'll set sail baby well the only reason why i did any of that is just to make it easier to pay taxes i don't i'm not trying to you have to remember like i can't i'm trying to grow grow a business like there's no i can only get i only do so much i don't i'm not gonna like well now you're insured too so like if you burn someone's house down you can be like oh well well i've always had insurance i've always had liability insurance but anyway i did this so that i can just like have someone pay my company and the money goes in and gets the taxes taken out of it immediately like that's that's my goal is so i don't have to like 10.99 my [ __ ] or like pay quarterly taxes i want to figure out a way to where i can just have it i don't even know if that's possible i don't know if you can do that or if it just the most white privileged thing ever i don't want to pay my taxes yeah dude you win i agree i want a way to not pay taxes hey what are you hitting there chris what's that a hide no it's an air bar lux i have i have my i have an actual but i don't have the the coils are in the mail so i have to go buy one of these pieces dylan what you smoking these days new ports 100 he's smoking in the house dude he's smoking newport 100 in the house jeff and i lead i mean what happened dude i love your parents i swear to god i love you i love both of your parents they have to deal with so much it's insane there's a lot more that i'm gonna have to deal with because i attached your [ __ ] address to this [ __ ] podcast oh yeah hey on a serious note how would you guys as far as like putting something out would you want to just put start putting the videos they should on youtube or do you want to isolate the audio and try to find a way to do that um well we can do both ways um you understand if we're gonna if we're gonna put it online like i don't i would i would like to get to what what i think would be cool is it's like if i'm talking to you say i'm talking to you guys about january 6th or whatever so you guys can see i can just pull audio i can just pull articles up and you guys can see what i'm talking about well yeah you're talking about sharing your screen yeah so i i mean i'm doing this on my phone now but i guess when i do it on the computer it'll probably be easier to figure out how to do that real [ __ ] solution this is both of you guys move to [ __ ] alabama and live in my kids um no yeah we can i mean we can do all that dude like we're just we're just getting [ __ ] started man don't [ __ ] cut me off seriously i'm dead serious man we'll [ __ ] get there but i mean let's talk about that cover art i can't i can't see that oh when you sent me a picture the other day i cut your [ __ ] faces out it glued him to a piece of paper i'm working really [ __ ] hard over here guys no one [ __ ] appreciates me i thought it was good though like that could be like the [ __ ] that idea you know our [ __ ] dumb childhood faces posted on three people's bodies going into a blender i put [ __ ] those skulls greg actually drew yeah that's yeah all that [ __ ] so he's like incorporated into it and then [ __ ] i mean you know i thought i'm in college you know got an art scholarship not a big deal oh my god oh yeah we do that i mean then you can [ __ ] we'll set it up to where you can like click on the link using my picture that i made it's a bipolar blender and then it can be either like if you do it on youtube you can have the [ __ ] footage of all this [ __ ] or i don't know if you guys are familiar with patreon or not i don't know if you guys know what patreon is but patreon and like you can you can you can se patreon is a website where we could go we could put our podcast on patreon and people could donate to it if they wanted to and like if say somebody donates if somebody donates have different levels of like membership so if somebody donates five bucks they get like early access to whatever they get behind the scenes or whatever or people can just don't know what you're talking about yeah because a podcast i listen to has they do they do that thing same thing and then they do like their shout outs to their patreons yeah they pretty much all do that they all do nowadays um but if you're a patreon to this podcast you get [ __ ] nothing except for the sweet sweet taste of the three of us all right well it's 11 o'clock dude i got i got a lot of [ __ ] to do he's an important man everybody it's important all right so wait we will give the patreons one free meal cooked by chef christopher perdue come on out come on come come on that's what you get five dollars donate all right keep on keep it live and also we'll we'll talk later [ __ ] you all
2022-04-22 02:26
