Relationship Q&A｜Parenting + Love + New Company
Having too much concrete. My favorite part is that it is safe, secure and clean. I agree. Of course there are strange people in Tokyo, but I still think it is safe. Raising children with peace of mind.
When I went for a run from Shibuya on New Year's Day, I dropped my credit card and driver's license and ran 10 km. I found my credit card on the ground and my driver's license was delivered to the police station. I appreciate that. This sense of security is everywhere in Japan. Answer as Kimono mom. What does that mean? I don't know... My twenties were quite turbulent.
That's what you were until two years ago. Right, I'm still 31. Too long ago for me. I think people in their twenties should know that we all are the main character in our own lives. I'm not in the position to say thought... No matter what your personality, you're the star of your own life.
We should make life decisions based on that. No one forces you to do it, you do it of your own will. Right, he is not at home at all...!
We’re always in touch on LINE or something, aren't we? We keep in touch every day and send each other videos. Right! That's big, isn't it? Sutan loves to do it. When Moto is away on his work, we wake up in the morning and like "Let's send Dad a video!" or "Is Dad sending us a video?" A phone call takes time from each other, but with video, you can watch it when you're free. We send each other videos. Something that no one else should see. I'm so shy taking video by myself. Really?
In a room is fine, but when I'm outside like at the airport. Middle aged man taking a video by himself. Middle aged man saying "Sutan~" But Sutan loves it! She is waiving to you in the video. It's cute. I really don't think I am in a position to talk about the town. There are many people who are still working there and I have great respect for them.
I think it's been an asset for me to see real craftsmanship from my teenage years. And I wore the kimono they made and had my hair done by professional I was allowed to put on an obi clasp which is like a piece of craftwork. The exposure I was given was a great asset and has helped me build the values I have today. Now I do think so.
At the time I was just desperate and didn't even think to study it, but now I consider it a good asset. Japan may not be the only one, but mental health is something we have only begun to hear about in the last few years. Yes, maybe times are changing. It's totally different now from my times.
I think so. We're a generation that has lived in a mindset where being strong is the expected thing to do. Still, I think people are weak and need to help each other to survive.
so I can forgive people on that basis. Right. Both in my professional and personal life. I think it's really important thing. I'm a very emotionally volatile person. That's right. I'm sure the video doesn't show that side of you.
I'm sure of it. He is an emotional person too. He is also touched and cries. He will go to any lengths to be there for me. When I am vulnerable, he listens to me regardless. That's what gets me saved.
By receiving that reassurance, I also learn from it. I am learning from Moto that it is important to be there for Sutan as well. Really? It is also very important for families to protect the well-being of their family members. I guess it's a question of whether we are kindhearted by nature to begin with, and to each other.
The video doesn't show at all whether Moe is angry or not. We all have our joys and sorrows, and it is a good thing to let them out. I think such an environment is important for the question as well.
You don't shoot when you're angry. That's the same for everyone. I am not saying to Sutan, but rather to Mr. Moto... I am putting my feelings on the Moto. Yes, you are. It happens, we're human, we get a little angry. But Moto never get angry.
Yeah, right. But it goes right away. You don't let it drag on. Right. I'm beginning to understand the cycle.
That's a very deep question. I worked part-time after I came to Tokyo. At that time, Moto interviewed me and we had no other involvement.
Like a 10 years ago...? I quit my part-time job right away, but then bumped into him about five years later. Just a quick story.
What kind of relationships have you had? What have you stumbled upon? So far, it has been a smooth ride. It may be now that we are stumbling. We are both very busy. Moto newly started a company, and it's a lot to take in for the first time. As a family, we live a different life than we did when he was working for someone.
We're doing our best, aren't we? We are like a team. The two of us are on a mission to raise Sutan together. We try to complete our mission while communicating about business matter Right.
We manage to do our best every day. Lately, I have been thinking that all I communicate with Moto is about business matters. I didn't like that. We're going to get busier and busier, and we're going to have less and less time for each other.
Even though we would do the Sutan's things together by no longer taking time for the two of us. Like our love interest... Intimacy I thought over the past two months that I could easily imagine us losing the feeling. I strongly feel that we need to somehow work out how to spend time together. Expressing feelings such as "I love you" or "Thank you for being here" with words, natural things. We cannot move forward without satisfying the two of us because we are closest to each other.
We have just recently talked about it. We talk a lot to each other. Right. We do.
We both don't like to keep going with pent-up feelings. What is our goal? Not to mention the happiness of my family. Since we started this as a family, I hope we can make everyone involved happy. That's what we started with. Happiness for the three of us and the people involved. We didn't tell you...
With Moto going independent, Moto and I started a company together. What does this company do? Just as the question earlier I've been in the business of making people happy through food I've been working with restaurants, izakayas, weddings and hotels. as well as manage them. Moe also wants to make everyone happy through home cooking. People all over the world. We want to make everyone happy through food.
We created this company in the hope that we could do such a thing in Japan and around the world. First it was soccer player. I thought it was impossible, so the schoolteacher Next, Ranger. You told me that. Then I got into the food industry, and now I'm interested in both food and ranger.
want to do something that combines both. He loves nature. Moto is lively in nature. I did musicals when I was little.
I wanted to be a stage actress because I was doing rhythmic gymnastics and wanted to be that athlete as well. I really liked being on stage, so I thought I wanted to dance on stage all the time. Even when I became a Maiko, I had occasion to dance on stage, so I felt I was making the best of it. When sleeping with Sutan Put on a foot, eye and shoulder massager. How tired are you? Sleep with a massager on. Moto gives me various massage machines every birthday.
How tired are you, really? You stay home so... I'm home all the time. I'm actually a homebody. That's a big different between us. You are so active person! I want to go out anytime. Even when we travel, I think the best part of the trip is doing nothing but Moto is like "Go to this place at 9 am!", "Take a bus at 9:50!", "Go to this at 10am!" and "This is the first lunch! This is the second!"... He like to visit many restaurants in a day.
I would like to relax and get a spa treatment at a nice hotel. Anyway, I agree with her first. Yes, yes, acceptance.
This method is very effective. If you accept whatever she says, it won't escalate. That's what Moe had studied and told me to do this way, from an online article or someone told her.
I think it was an article. You should accept their emotion first. Children are very sensitive to the word ”No” When they are told no, they get upset.
For example, if they want oranges, I'm like "I know you want to eat them, but you can't, so what do we do?" Then she's like "I'm okay to have the snuck over there." telling me how to improve the situation, Parents should be patient but if she's learning from this interaction in her own way, I can go along with her. Moto, come here.
You're meticulous. He's particular and well aware of little background things. Our house is clean because of him.
What were you like when you were little? 6-7 times, we moved around a lot. Both in Japan and abroad. I used to cry a lot, because I hated leaving my friends every time I moved. I think that's why I try to take care of my friends. He is a great friend and has good friends.
I am blessed with good friends. I vaguely remember crying in grades 1-2 and 4 at the thought of leaving my friends and changing rooms. Maybe that's why I value my friends so much. This would have influenced your current personality.
I hadn't thought about it, but now that you mention it, I guess so. I was a tomboyish kid because I had an older brother and a younger brother. I just hated being told to do this because I was a girl.
I hate being told to sit with my legs closed because I am a girl. I also hate being told to come home early or not to go out alone because I am a girl. I was determined to lose. Entering Geisha house, I learned how wonderful it was to be a woman and to be proud of being a woman.
I had a good six years of solid reformation there, and then I quit Now I am returning to my childhood like. I'm at freedom. What do you think? I'd be very happy to have a child now, If that happens, we will be prepared and will try to make such a family structure. You have something on the tooth. You too.
We just ate. You have some too. I'd welcome them, and I'll be re-engineering our life plan to put a reasonable structure in place. But I've seen firsthand how hard to raise a child. It is not the same as wanting a child from a childless state. I had very bad morning sickness and couldn't go out for 2-3 months. I had the sickness right up to the moment I gave birth, and I don't know if I could do that while raising Sutan.
I can't say I want it easily because it costs money and responsibility. It's not our call to make. That's right. Don't know if we can do it even if we wanted to. It will be very lively. Even one person is that lively.
I'm sure it will be fun and very exciting, It is difficult to make a decision before you have it. It will be what it will be. I think so too. This was actually the most asked question. Really? Wow! It was my second time, and I really didn't like being asked to take on the role of being someone's wife or mother.
You have to be feminine, or stay home all the time, or cook every meal. I no longer wanted to play the role of serving my family at the expense of myself. But he tells me I should just enjoy doing what I like so I thought I could envision a future with him. How about you? The Kyoto trip was the biggest thing for me.
I fell in love with Moe and her family. I just thought, yo ur grandmother, your father and mother, they're such a nice family. We talked about getting married that day just like that. You didn't take long to propose me. Not at all.
Just like that. We were outside at the time. He proposed to me while we were looking at Daimonji. There were so many people there, I could hear it and tried to answer. A security guard came in like "Please step aside.".
Such a perfect timing. He's like ”Please step aside.” It was funny. Oh I'd love to! Right. I can't wait! Right. After covid settles down, let's do some events in Japan.
In Japan? Meet up in Japan? It's global. Nice! They will come. I can introduce many good places and delicious foods in Japan. Kimono mom tourism! Sounds good! Many things to introduce. That's right. Hold the flag and like "This way, please! It doesn't have to be like that.
We hold events and so on. Nice! If anyone is coming to Japan at that time. I'd love to take them to Kyoto. Sounds fun to meet up in Japan. You are struggling with the direction.
But that's how it is with everyone before they start something. The first 2-3 years, give it a try first. You don't know what's good and what's bad until you try.
So just give it a try. I'm in pain. You sound like my mom! There is no such thing as Ultra-C, That's right. so if you try your best to do what is in front of you as yourself, you will see what is next. Sometimes we can see further than what we were worried about.
I see. I was the one that nothing lasted, as you know. After I quit Maiko, I did various jobs but they all didn't last.
I did many things, but didn't last. Then I finally found Kimono Mom. With a variety of experiences...
Moto worked at the same place for years which is probably a confidence booster, and that's great. I can't keep anything going. I think I've found my place in the world by starting Kimono Mom. But none of my experience up to that point was a waste. Because I feel many different resources made me who I am today.
Accept that you may not have a clear direction and don't deny yourself too much. We need to keep our hearts from breaking. That's nice. My inspiration to become a YouTuber came when I was covered in Paulo's Day in Life. It was the first time I saw a YouTuber, so I figured there's a job like that too. Just then I was in a state of postpartum depression and had lost the meaning of life because all I did was take care of the baby.
I started YouTube in search of an opportunity to connect with society. I googled ”How to edit Youtube" etc. and have done so in a haphazard way. I'm watching next to her and she's doing everything. Planning, menu planning, shopping, filming, editing, sound, translation, making thumbs up, setting up... I think this is really amazing.
I was thinking "She is brilliant!" I'm doing whatever I want. Still amazing. It makes me very happy to think that people like my videos filled with things I like. Nice. Thank you everyone. Well, I think it would be nice to have a relationship that is not overwhelming for either of the partners. Equality, and that we are not lying to ourselves.
I was thinking totally different thing. Don't you think so? It is interesting that we thought of completely different types of questions in response to a single question. This is important, right? Otherwise, it won't last. You can get married as many times as you want. Just a paper. After all, the work of building a family with the person you met is very precious. It doesn't work when one of us has something built up in mind.
Not only to them but also not lie to ourselves and keep that way and you can do it with or without a partner. It's also something you can't blame the other person for. And you? I was thinking totally different thing.
To stick to the question. You are young, and someone who's been single have made a promise to be together. It means that you have someone to share the beautiful things you used to see alone. You should show them wonderful things, and you only have one life, so you two should see a lot of amazing things together.
That's my thought. Totally different. Wow, that's very dreamy. Like I told you before, I want to share what I think is great as much as possible.
And want to show you all the beautiful things in the world I saw. You should see a lot with the people you are with. Totally different answer. Nice, I love that answer more. Right? You were like "You can get married as many times as you want." That's not a good answer.
To someone who just got engaged. If you've been talking about going to see beautiful things together while you're young. You can't actually go there without thinking about it. Busy with the day-to-day. I think you see it differently than you have seen it alone, now that you have a family.
I like your romanticism. Isn't it normal? But you don't say "You can get married as many times as you want." Never. Absolutely. Cook book? When will it happen? Let's publish. Let's get it out there. I'd love to! We will.
I already have ideas and concepts to write about. When I became a parent, I realized that I could never be perfect. In anything. I have trouble raising my kids every day. I'm not trying to be perfect and make it hard.
I'd like to leave something for Sutan, even just one little thing or pass it on to the next generation. I've become very aware of that. I always wonder what Sutan will think when she watches the video when she grows up.
Even if it's a book, I have something to tell Sutan, I want those closest to me, like Moto and Sutan... to cherish. I was wondering how you would put it all together. Do you understand what I feel? 500... questions on this post and received about 200 DMs. Really? It's about 700.
Since last night? Yes, since midnight. Wow! I'm looking at all of them, but there were some I couldn't introduce to you. Let's do it again another time.
If we have questions we can ask them. That's right! Anything! Can you answer me? While the clock is turning around. Not even. We've talked quite extensively. Right? As for what's to come, we're making some progress right now. I may be able to let you know in a little while.
The idea was originally based on feedback from all of you. That's right! That's how we started to take on challenges, and we may soon be able to present what we have started. Looking forward to it! The messages from you guys are the reason and source of my work.
Two years ago, I was suffering from postpartum depression and lost sight of the meaning of life. I am really appreciate your support. Because you guys accept me warmly, I can take on new challenges too. And so it is with parenting. It is motivating because there are people who accepted me. I feel like I'm learning from you guys.
For two years, I've been sharing about Japanese home cooking. I'm happy to see people follow the recipes and share them on Instagram. While I am grateful, at the same time, I see from your comments that it is still difficult to find Japanese seasonings and feel we have the challenges through your comments. I would like to work to bring more Japanese home cooking to kitchens around the world and I would like to make the world where people can enjoy such cooking.
Let's send out the message. Ok! Thank you for your comments and DMs! I read all of them. I will share more next time. See you! Bye bye!