Heavy metal and heavy hearts: The Parkway Drive documentary | Australian Story
foreign [Music] like really honest it feels literally like the first time I've had like my friends back since like year one of the band do you notice anything in your body as you say this like anything yeah like when I first got the call to work with Parkway Drive I was a bit like I know the name but who are they I had to look them up [Music] it was definitely not who I expected it's not the music that I would listen to seek out and listen to you mine's not really relating to anyone else I get a sense that for these guys this is pretty new territory without even knowing that I felt really disconnected from the band unvalued I guess and uninspired we're in a heavy metal band we're not meant to be softies talking about our feelings and stuff we're meant to be like these yeah like kill then this and that but yeah so it's really foreign our way of communicating with our friends was teasing each other and like you just never gave anyone a compliment back in the early days we were definitely best mates just having fun but looking back it was quite toxic the way we would relate to each other is by pulling each other down pointing out each other's shortcomings then it would be like a war zone my light bulb moment actually occurred when you know Luke kind of was the first person to go you know what I'm really sorry guys we're trying to resolve some pretty long-standing big issues within the band I was literally prepared to not be on the band anymore it sounds like a lot of the other guys were as well the counseling was the last hurray that was can we save this like is this savable and I don't think anyone had any expectations this whole process of trying to work it out started out as trying to save the band and has turned into trying to save our friendships [Music] [Applause] [Music] we've been going non-stop for almost 20 years now every album we have in Australia is a gold record we've literally held a lot headlined the largest heavy metals Festival on the planet in vacant it's like 80 to 100 000 people wow that was the biggest I've ever seen I know we are Australia's largest heavy metal act it's kind of surreal we're up there with the top musical exports of this country full stop pop rock r b whatever the hell's going on we're up in that echelon we'd be household names wouldn't you we are filming with Fox league for NRL finals so it's something completely different for us and it's pretty exciting these are people that probably aren't Parkway fans maybe never even heard of Parkway one two three four a lot of Australians don't know who we are because of the genre of music it's quite off-putting to a lot of people and I get that [Music] life most households want to be yelled at by this man there's definitely a stigma attached to a heavy metal but it's like oh yuck um or oh that's the devil's music for me the attraction to it it's the energy I'm not an aggressive or assertive person in my everyday life but there's something in me that needs to be released there's only two ways I can seem to get that out and that's through playing heavy metal live and you know surfing seems to help with that too [Music] we all grew up in Byron Bay and it's not where you'd expect a heavy metal band to come from personally I'm into surfing nature meditation spirituality healthy food I've never drunk alcohol vegan and I happen to be in a heavy metal band we're all new each other from either high school or the surf we started in the garage still in the garage we definitely don't fit the picture of a typical metal band definitely not at all you know you have to wear all black or giant boots and you have to have long hair we just weren't interested [Music] the Parkway Drive Legend is five Surfer bombs starting a band on a street called Parkway Drive in the drummers parents basement everything they say would seem piece of fear inside of me back in those days it just sounded like a hell of a lot of noise time went by I began to sound proof various parts of the house eventually with soundproof doors ceilings over the windows the cows seem to enjoy it our first show was March 21st 2003 at the Byron Youth Center there's fists flying and kids jumping off the speakers and it was just complete chaos I don't know how an adult didn't shut that down [Music] from there within the space of a year blew up [Music] the way we made our Mark was relentless touring it was just all about having fun for us there was no seriousness or pressure whatsoever because there was no goal or expectations to get anywhere all of a sudden a thousand people at a show and we're like holy [ __ ] what is this and that sort of paved the way through everything that came after last time I went to Europe was just a complete new adventure [Music] we played some horrible shows there was literally 10 people there it sucked [Applause] but then you play another show and there'd be a bit of momentum [Music] we hadn't been in Europe long when our bass player informed us that he actually had to fly home he was going to become a dad we were like who do we get another bass player that knows his instrument and he's a musician and really good and we just thought ah [ __ ] it let's get a mate that we love hanging out with because he'd sold much for us on tours previously [Music] so I was like a full-blown fan of the band like but I was their good friends as well we just called him up and said do you want to come play bass I said me I've never I've never played bass in my life they're like yeah you don't have to be good oh my God oh God sure enough I was atrocious not cool at all I was dropping my pick and somehow that they stuck with me [Applause] uh yeah I felt like an imposter when fans and stuff get my signature I'm just like you don't want my signature I'm just like you I just woke up this morning and did a poo and had breakfast like I'm just the same as you where are we Czech Republic we slept in cow patty and I got attacked by ants I think we did a five month tour of the world that first tour that I did and in five months we slept in two hotels the entire time and things fell into place the more people we played in front of the more we kind of grew [Music] I don't know for me the heavy metal is incredibly physically cathartic it's the place to let out all of these repressed feelings [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] what do you think those people are doing when they're in the mosh pictures losing their mind and throwing their limbs around and jumping on each other they're not trying to hurt anyone they're just like it lets it out and then you walk out of that venue better than when you walked in probably about five years in when the band actually started to make money I started noticing the the salaries weren't the same I had to talk to him once he found out we got paid more than him after a tour and it like shocked him and I was like yeah this is you know we do all this work you're just playing bass that's how it is [Music] the way it was explained to me was that I'm a contractor basically just a hired musician I played live and that was that was it [Music] so I always viewed my role in the band has just been the bottom of the pecking order the [ __ ] kicker but it's hard like when you when you're watching your friends buy their you know oh I don't want to talk about that but when you're watching your friends earning all this money and you're earning far less money it starts playing on your mind and you start having resentment if it's a tired old Story how money breaks up friendships and bands and stuff [Music] [Applause] it's forward to where we've got a whole bunch of successful albums and the band's Chrome significantly [Applause] you know we weren't really ready um for the extra workload that that would that would bring as well we didn't Outsource anything if there was a job to be done we learned how to do that job like someone in the band took on that role we are here in Berlin for day one of rehearsals like you need a manager Luke learns how to manage we want to make a movie Ben learns how to edit movies you need a producer Jeff learns how to do production you need someone to do interview on like stagecraft I'll learn how to do that one what that meant for us is we started drifting further into our own little worlds fried Luke being the manager has done an incredible job in many many aspects but in a band you go to the manager for emotional support and for help my co-manager has to do everything but anytime I had to talk to Luke about managerial issues I didn't feel like I was respected as a band member it just looks untidy in fact I've been asking for two days to see it fixed though and I haven't seen it just the way you know Luke acted on tour the way Luke made us feel as people I had a lot of trust issues like with Luke anyway because he's you know he's running all the band he's running all our finances we're making nothing like straight up pouring every cent the shows make back into putting the show on I just yeah it wasn't very tolerant of people that's kind of our strategy so if anyone did something that annoyed me I'd hold against them and then it'd build up like I would come home and not want to see the guys but the biggest we've ever been by far and we're potentially losing money on the tour not making money yeah and you're just gonna and we got to a point where we're actually starting to make pretty serious money it did seem to affect certain members and they seem to think that they deserve to be paid more than others so I expected to be honest but like why is no one in the band getting that there's more work involved in what we're doing in this band now that it's blown up and like Luke's working like 14 hour days every single day volatile take one and I'm flying around the world to do a press tour when everyone else is staying at home but I think there needs to be more time of it there's no lull for certain members of the band so when we started the band The Core members basically had a handshake deal to share everything equally because everything wasn't much and it just stayed the same until 15 years later when we said you know let's review this lyrics but you were there supporting but Luke's managing on making the movies Jeff's writing most of these riffs it's like it's so hard to actually come to a terms with who's worth what in what situation and that was a big part of why it kind of fell apart I think Ben was affected the most out of those discussions and the rearrangement and yeah he obviously wasn't happy about it but he accepted it I earned a lot of respect for Ben for him to be able to to take what he took and move on covert hits and unknowingly the bands at a complete boiling point we're not playing live shows so let's write a record writing a record when someone says that it puts a shutter down my spine because I'm the one doing it producing it and Engineering it every single time I do one a portion of my soul goes with me oh go and put the sauce on there's a deadline for the recording of the album gets closer he changes he becomes stressed he doesn't have the ability to be Family Guy and then work guy because his studio is here but his family's also here having him disappears really frustrating and he will just keep going until all hours of the morning no matter how early he's got to get up to just get something right [Music] I do see the other guys kind of just you know fly in and fly out and for me that's hard to watch [Music] go go so things definitely came to a head recording our new album darker still Jeff especially became very consumed with like the idea of perfection [Music] well Winston and Jeff seem to really get to a bad place this record Jeff's kind of the main riff Rider me and him write a lot of the songs but he's the main guy I'd call him Winston writes all his own lyrics and vocals but a lot of times Jeff changes all them and Winston can get upset with that what you did then was so sick but I I really do think it needs to be condensed I really do I was a a creative bully I've come down here cut all these vocals in half you know rearrange stuff you know which for me it sounds good but it's not his story it's not his original intent foreign I just couldn't get that out of my head that Melody over everything else you know the way things sound is far more important for this band than you know his message [Music] the lack of understanding of what I actually do and my and what goes into what I do was evident there and like it hit me oh they didn't get what I was doing for 20 years like actually they didn't even understand the thing that I'm passionate about like it's not on the day we finished the record Winston I couldn't even look at each other you know if I was stuck on a desert island I'd be with any person except him on earth like I've really I was really annoyed by him [Music] I had a couple of talks with Winston and he just mentioned that the other guys were questioning my management they were assuming I'm dropping the ball in certain areas okay I pretty much prepared myself to not be in the Band anymore I figured out on my finances and I wanted to make sure I could keep my house um if I wasn't in Parkway anymore [Music] crisis Point basically came after all of this was going on [Music] degree to have a band meeting like to talk about where we're at plans for the future how everyone's feeling [Music] so driving to the hall in Lennox head it's early afternoon I had a lot to say and a lot to vent the fights the files the scars and broken bones beneath it all the cracks begin to show the hurt we walk into the meeting not as loaded guns but as nuclear warheads [Music] intention was to hold everyone else responsible for how they felt at that point someone's like I need validation for this you need to tell me this and they're like well if I didn't know that you need to tell me this [Music] see all of a sudden it's just like boom this Fisher runs straight down [Music] he realized that there's like years of resentment here I was like we have to see a counselor before we do anything we need to be able to talk to each other before we can even think about negotiating [Music] oh foreign call came that we're canceling our American tour I kind of expected it but it was also a surprise I'm so far removed from the whole business side of the band that I was Sammy oblivious to all this stuff Luke said hey everyone's at each other's throats so we're making a decision to do counseling and so I just said yeah okay I hope you guys work it out I was actually starting to question touring in the pandemic I actually got a job to try and see what A Hard Day's Work is like so I worked for two months doing like proper hard labor and I loved it you know I was getting prize from the boss telling me how good I was at it and making honest money and I was thinking this feeling that I'm getting is how you should feel about your job so I kind of was stoked when the tour was canceled [Music] I think it's a very unique experience for Five Guys to be in a meeting in late teens and forming this experience and are turning into an international business basically and in the first session it was really clear really quickly that between Luke and Ben and Jeff and Winston that there had been stuff that had gone down I thought we'd do a theme check-in this time which is of course talking about how you're arriving basically Sean is telling us to remove our armor and you know that's all we've ever known what you first came with I think everyone kind of felt safe with him I didn't know how to speak to anyone you know all I knew was a pivotal point for me which was really important was to see essentially the biggest bully in the room which is Luke be vulnerable and you know to like acknowledge why he acted in the way he did [Music] when I look back at how I behaved within the band and outside the band I'm pretty disappointed in myself for sure particularly with you I look I feel like you've come the furthest like I've always been touted as an [ __ ] basically all through High School a bit of a prick to to girls and and other people we obviously had our tensions coming in here but and I just feel like you've really done the work on yourself and you've really like grown a lot and I I feel totally different around you now he was one of the most boarded up Pious walls out of anyone in the group and he just brought it all down I was just really proud of him it made me go right this is it this is a really important moment in Parkway drive's future this is this is huge and I want to be on board to me the communication is the key and if I if I come for the effort in communicating with you guys we're definitely peeling back all the layers we're talking about those early days how we even got to acting like that from their own childhoods and upbringings and it's very it's getting very personal in there [Music] the culture that we grow up in in Byron in Australia at large really was the culture of writing off or teasing your mates that would be like a war zone like you had to be on guard someone would be attacking you and you'd have to be ready to respond once I got into it I got good at it I'm not proud of it but yeah you know I I figured the game out you know attack everyone else until no one's going to attack you again I think the concept of toxic masculinity 100 relates to us I think it relates to the era that we were brought up I think it relates to the way that we chose to treat each other and having things happen in the band over the years where like that ain't right man like like you're just bullying him and other people go nah it's just funny and you're going no that's not that's not right you never know just what you've got until it's slipping through your finger it was pretty evident that everyone wanted to feel like they're in a band again like in a band of mates and it wasn't about trying to get the biggest slice of the pie that was the point where it was that joke he needs to come to the next meeting after I think the third or fourth counseling session they said oh we really want you to come and I said oh I don't think I've got anything to say like you sure you want me there and they said yeah it would be we all want you there I was completely blindsided because I went in expecting not to talk and all of a sudden they all said something really nice about me and what they appreciate about me and it was so hot so hard like I'm about to cry talking about it now because it's just so foreign to hear your friends say nice things about you then they asked me how I was feeling and how was I feeling I basically just exploded and just broke down and yeah I had like a really hard few years and very traumatic traumatic thing happened um where in 2016 my partner Tegan was diagnosed with cancer terminal cancer it was really really difficult the hardest thing I've ever had to go through foreign [Music] [Laughter] bands existence had led up to this one tool that was coming up and then the day that I was leaving to the airport I dropped to her friend's house and she said through a through her tears she said I don't don't want you to go stay and I I thought what that would mean to the band I put the band before her and I said like I have to go I can't cancel on the boys this last minute like um and so I went and that was the last time I ever saw her I'll live with that kill every day now that's the biggest sacrifice than any of us have made just looking around and seeing them crying with me kind of made me realize you know these guys do care that's what he must have gone through and the fact that he did it for our band you know and at that time we're not even I was still thinking he's just a feeling bass player I feel killed [Music] in the dark car park out the back as we all made our way to our cars they said hang on we've got something else we want to talk to you about before you go we've all decided we want you in the partnership we want you to actually be in the band and we all shook hands and they said welcome to the band 17 years later I like it finally in the band dryer is now a partner and a director of the company and now he has a percentage of whatever the bandits so we're all making a sacrifice financially to include him but we think it's the right thing to do and it should have been done earlier [Music] for me personally I know not everyone's the same but I don't want all this new sensitive men thing to interrupt the good um revving each other up and having a joke I love it a lot like I love getting called the dog Rooter and this and that like I actually legit love that and I don't want that to stop yeah me too I like it too but and it it all comes down to like the intention I feel like it's just a happy meeting with all this stuff like if we were like this all the time I'd leave the band I would seriously I'm kidding we have all grown in lower growth in this might lose some friends because they'll see me crying on TV but that's fine that's easy to photoshop Parkway Drive is being fixed I don't think it's being fixed we are in a much better place than we were a few years ago or even a few months ago to be honest wow so I guess you know the lesson is therapy works yeah man and it's helpful yeah for real like for real you're about to head off to Europe for a couple weeks of touring first tour back man we're all really psyched for it I'm in a familiar Place doing a familiar thing and feeling very unfamiliar like it's the first time we're playing to our fans in Europe in three years it was the first time playing as a unit since we've done all this personal work together and we felt this connection grow even stronger put us back into our comfort zones where you know everyone's laughing and the ego is applying um you know can we hold true to these new skills lab let's find out time will tell [Music] [Applause] what the [ __ ] [Music] where the [ __ ] out [Music]
2022-10-19 09:33
