Farnoosh Brock: "The Serving Mindset" | Talks at Google

Farnoosh Brock:

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Imagine. This, what. If we, could do business without. Selling. What. If we, could have all the results, we want in our professional, careers or businesses. Without, ever, having, to sell, hi. I'm faranoush brock and it is a privilege. To be here at Google with, you today talking. About my book the serving mindset, we're. Going to talk about how. You. Can change your conversations. From, selling, to serving. To achieve, anything, you want, I come. From an academic family. I studied. Electrical engineering in college I wrote, a master's, thesis on, spread-spectrum. Code. Division multiple access, for, wireless communications. I tell. You that to, show you how, far, I was, from, the world of selling, and I, liked, it that way all. My, life the. Way I had, been experiencing. Traditional, selling. The, way people had pitched their, agenda, to me had really, turned me off of, selling, and so. When, I went to the corporate world to. Start my career I, wanted. To build a nice, protective shell, around myself, to, avoid, selling, and to keep my attitude and distance around selling and I, was lucky my, technical, roles allowed me to do that there. Were those occasions, when I had to sell myself to my management which, I did very poorly but. Otherwise, I was, able to make a living and still. Keep my distance from selling, until. 2011. When, I decided, to quit my job and, start, my business and, that. Is when my nice, protective, shell cracked, open. I couldn't. Keep that distance or attitude. Around selling, because, I was in business now and. Yet. How. Could I go out there and be, selling, when, I couldn't. Stand being, sold, to, that's. When I felt, this was a real dilemma and. Even, then deep, down I felt, there was a way I could, stay in business and, maybe, even thrive, in my business, and be. True, to my, character, and my values, and like, who I was by the end of the day so. That curiosity. Led me down a path of research which, later became the foundation of the book the serving mindset, in. That. Research, I found, much, to my relief that, I am far from the only one having. This dilemma, around selling. Smart. Talented, highly. Educated. Professionals, and, entrepreneurs like us struggle. With this every, day. Why. Because. Nobody. Likes. To be sold to not, even your, most eager, buyer in the world and yet. We feel we, have to sell, because. We need to create the results that we want in our careers, and our businesses, and so. From. That perspective. Selling. Becomes, the necessary, evil in the equation and, I've. Seen, two paths emerge. From, that one. Is for those of us who feel well. What's, a little compromise around my values, at least, I'm being responsible. I am, doing what I need to do to get my job done, even. As I feel, conflicted, about it, even, as I apologize. For the selling I'm doing I do what, needs to be done, there. Is the other path, for. Those of us who, feel I can't, stand selling I am NOT a salesperson. So, then we need to build that protective, shell and find. A line of work that allows us to keep that distance, because, at least at the end of the day you, don't have to do the nauseating. Work of selling you're being true to who you are. Now. Neither. Of those two paths serves. Us because. In both of them we compromise, something and. I. Found. Maybe, we don't have to do the compromise, do. We really have to compromise between. Our values. And, prophets or our. Characters, and our bottom line I, served. With. The serving, mindset, you. Don't have to do that because, I, remove. Selling. From the equation, we're. Not going to talk about how to sell more compassionately. Or more, gently. Or with, empathy. No. We. Are going to remove, selling, from the equation. And yet. Still, achieve. The results, that we want, now. Before, I go further let me define, selling. And serving, so, that we are on the same page, the. Way I define serving. Is this well. No but let me start with selling, selling. Is when, you, have your own highest, agenda. At heart you, have your agenda your goals and you're going after them when, you sell you win when you don't sell you lose. Serving. Is when. You have your prospect. Your would-be, customer. Or clients, highest. Interest, at heart. Regardless. Of outcome for. You, when. You serve, you, can only win, when. You serve if, they, buy from you right away you win if they don't buy from you but buy from you down the road sometimes, months and years down the road because. Of how you treated, them you, still win sometimes. Your prospect, never buys from you but. They refer, you they endorse, you they speak, highly of you, because, of the way you served, them. So. That's the way I define selling, and serving, now, I said earlier we, are going to remove, selling, from the equation, let's, see how we can do that and get, away with it so to speak, so. To do that we. Start by looking at, our mindset. Our. Mindset, is our, perspective. Onto the world it's our version of reality, your. Mindset, is a collection, of beliefs, that, you have accumulated, over the course of your life your, upbringing your, relationships.

Your Education, and it's, your truth on certain. Subject. Now. Having lived, life you. May also know that, after some, transformative. Experiences. You. May emerge, with a shift, in mindset a shift, in perspective. So. Your mindset isn't set in stone, what. We want to explore. Together today, is that, mindset, around selling, even. If you've never thought about it you have a current, mindset, around. Selling, what. I want to explore, with you is is, that mindset. Accurate. Is it true and is, it helping, you do. Your greatest, work in this world and serve. Yourself. And those that you hope to impact. So. We're, going to do that by, exploring, the three, guiding, principles. Of the serving mindset, the. First principle, says, stop. Selling. Start. Serving. In, this. Principle. You'll rewire, your, brain and, you, remove, selling. From, your inner dialogue from. Your inner voice. So. Your. Conversation. Your inner dialogue becomes, I am NOT having sales conversations. I am having serving. Conversations. I am, not in a sales role I am in a serving, role I do, not, need a selling, strategy, thank you very much I need, a serving, strategy. When. You do this when, you start to remove selling, from your inner dialogue, you. Feel a sense of ease and call I see, this when I work with my clients they. Immediately. Feel a sense of ease because. Instinctively. You. Are wired to, help to, be of genuine, health and service, you. Feel you have to do more hence, the pressure of selling, but, Jen you instinctively. You are wired to help so. When you give, yourself permission to, remove, the word selling, from your inner dialogue you. Feel a sense of ease and calm. So. If years down the road you, remember, nothing else from this talk except. I am not selling I am serving, every. Time you enter those conversations. You, will have taken away the golden nugget but, we're gonna continue. Let's. Look at how we can, do this let's make it more practical and, tangible. To. Do that you, need to be willing to set aside something, that, you've been carrying with yourself, for a long time and that. Is your, agenda. We. All have. An agenda, whether, your agenda, is to get promoted to that vice president, role or to, get a YES on that contract, or to, bring on board ten more clients, you, have an agenda.

Now. There's nothing wrong with an agenda but. When. Your mind is on an agenda when, you are in a conversation. With, your prospect. It. Pulls, you out of the present, moment with. Your prospect, it. Is impossible. To be a hundred percent present. With someone and have, your mind on an agenda. Now. Why do you want to be a hundred percent present. With them, because. That. Is the only way, we. Can form a genuine. Connection. It's. The only way you can truly, listen. To what's being said and to. Hear, someone, and then, to respond. Accordingly. You. Cannot, do that when, your mind is on an agenda of your own, but. When you do that when, you set aside your agenda. You. Can create. Deep. Trust, in that, slowing, down and in, that listening, place and. So. As you do that, you are starting, to go. Into the serving, mindset. Listen. Let's make this practical I'll share with you an example from. One of my clients who learned how to do this, so. My, client Patricia runs. A successful IT, consulting. Firm and she's very good at what she does now. As an, introvert. And a techie, she. Was, feeling awkward. Tense. And uncomfortable. When. She would step into her prospecting. Conversations. And so. She came, to me because she hated selling, so. We started to work together and we gave her some tools and techniques to overcome this. Now. As she, learned how. To set, aside her, agenda which, she hated anyway, because she hated selling, but she felt she had to have it she. Was suddenly more comfortable, in her own skin and, as. A result, she was more confident, and then. She. Was a stepping into those conversations. From that place and finally. She, was able to really hear. What her prospects, were saying and really. Really, listen, and get. To the real, challenges. The, real problems. Not just the surface level ones as. She. Did this over time, something. Remarkable. Started, to happen, her. Prospects. Were, now leaning. Into Patricia. To ask her how they could work with her how, they could hire her in a business, capacity. So. She learned how to go from, selling to serving. By setting aside her agenda and she, was creating, real, business. Opportunities. As a result. Now. When. You learn to do that you. Find at the heart of the serving, mindset, two, things, deep. Caring. And deep, curiosity. For. Your prospect. Regardless. Of outcome, for you, so. When, you do this, you. Start to create that connection we talked about you, start, to lay the foundation. Of deep. Trust, and not, only that you. Do this because you. Have. A solution, for them you, have something. That could help with their problems, but. Until. You have gone, deep, into those. Conversations. You cannot, know for a fact whether, your, genius, solution is, what, they need and, I. Think it's, safe to say we've all been in a place. Especially, as an engineer, where I love to solve problems, where, someone comes to you with their challenges and your, intention, is to help them but, you're not sure whether, your solution, is right but you put it forth and it's, not quite, well-received yet. We. Don't want, to. Offer our solution, before its, we. Are sure it's the real solution, and so, if you do that by going deep, into a conversation with. Deep caring, and deep curiosity. Now. Let's look at how this would look in a corporate, life example, I spent. 12 years in the corporate world and since, then I've had the pleasure of working with many, corporate, professionals from. All walks of life, when. Your average, corporate employee, reaches. A certain level of experience. Qualifications. And, expertise. They. Want to advance to that next level and get promoted and move up the ladder so. When, similar, opportunities, present themselves in, their organizations, they, want to secure it so. The next natural step is having a conversation with. Their manager. Here. Is how those conversations. Usually unfold. The. Corporate employee, shares. How much they want that promotion how. Well, qualified. They are for it and maybe. Maybe. That they even deserve it they've, worked really really hard to get here the.

Manager. Agrees. Shows. Polite, interest, and might, even make some promises, they. Have a great. Conversation, together, and then. Absolutely. Nothing, happens, it's. Very frustrating, because. The corporate employee is wondering, what, else do I need to do how, much harder, do I need to work and it's, not about that it's. About the, value. Positioning. In that. Conversation. So. What the employee, is doing is. Justifying. Why. They are the best candidate. They may they may very well be but that's their approach, and that's, not, serving. So. Let's, see how this conversation, would be different, if they, were to, come to it from a place of serving. And deep. Caring, and deep curiosity. They. Would set aside their agenda, which in this case is to get promoted they. Would step into that conversation and, be, really, curious about, their management's. Real, challenges. About. The real problems. About, the organization's. As real goals, and struggles, and what, a real solution, would look like, so. They, would ask different, questions, some. Of those questions might be well. You know John or Janet, please, say, your manager's name I, have. I've, been doing some research and I believe these are the three, top challenges, in our project, I would, like to explore those further with you would, you be open to that or. Here. Is what I see to be the top challenge, we have coming, up for the organization, in the coming year and I have some ideas on how I can be of value toward. A solution would. You be open to exploring that with me, now. This line of questioning, shows. That you are deeply curious, and you care about your. Management, your company, you're not an individual, contributor, now you are a leader, you, are having a different, conversation altogether. And, that. Welcomes. A different response, from your manager, now. You may not get promoted from this conversation, the next day next, month or even the next year but, what happens, is that you change, the, perception. Of your management. On you, they. Begin, to see you as value. As an, asset, to the organization as. A leader, and, I, have seen this, shift, in conversations. Change. People's. Careers, the course of their careers, and invite. Unexpected. Opportunities. So. We use deep caring, and deep curiosity, we, set aside our agenda, and we, enter, those conversations. From that place. Now. I talked earlier about how instinctively. We all want to be genuine, health and service. Sometimes. We. Confuse, serving. With, pleasing. So. We're gonna explore, that a little bit, pleasing. Is when you, are talking to your prospect, and I use the word prospect. I mean your prospective, employers. Partners, customers clients. What have you and. You. Feel you have to agree to everything they say you, have to be nice you tiptoe. Around delicate. Topics, you, don't speak your mind because, it might upset them, or it, might not be something they want to hear even though it, would benefit, them so. That's pleasing, that, is not the same as serving.

Remember. With serving, we, have our prospects. Highest. Interest, at heart we. Need to be willing to tell them something, that would be of benefit. To them even, if it may not be well-received. So, the distinction, between pleasing, and serving, is what, I want to demonstrate in, my next example, so. One of my other clients, Danielle. Is a scientist, by training very. Good at what she does again she. Recently got promoted to, the role of chief, marketing. Officer, CMO, at her company, in. This, role her. Job was, to form. Key, partnerships. With other companies and she. Was having some, struggle, doing, this so. As we worked together we. Saw that her real challenge. Was she. Didn't feel comfortable telling, her prospects. Exactly. What she wanted to tell them she, felt she had to please, them and agree with everything, so. As a result she was having surface-level, conversations. And she. Wasn't getting responses. To her messages, she wasn't getting invited, to other conversations. Her relationships. Were not moving, further. So. As we, worked together, we, gave her several tools to overcome this, one, particular, tool that, she was, really able to use was, the art of asking. Permissions. So. When she came to a place in the conversation. Where she felt I really, need to go deeper, but. Her personal boundaries weren't. Making her feel comfortable she, would say which. Would, it be okay to ask you more questions around, this challenge, you shared with me would you be comfortable with, us exploring, that deeper, that. Way she respected, her own boundaries, but. She stopped pleasing. And went, deeper, she did the work of serving. As a result. She got way more than she bargained for so. Not, only were her prospects, prospective, partners, more. Than happy to tell her their challenges, at length she. Was able to move, forward in those relationships. Why. Is that, what. Did she do. Daniel, created. The safe space, for, her prospects, to, feel comfortable. With her to. Know they wouldn't be judged, if they shared a particular, fear or something they were ashamed of or their real challenges. And they. Were able to be vulnerable as a result, so. She, was able to lay the foundation. Of real, relationships. She was able to get to the real challenges. Of her prospects, and offer her, solutions, if she, saw fit. So. Danielle. Went from pleasing. To serving, so. In this first guiding, principle, I am not selling, I am serving we. Saw how you go from selling to serving, how, you go from justifying, why you're the best candidate, to serving. And how, you go from pleasing. To serving. Right. Let's, talk about the second guiding principle, of the serving, mindset, and that, is, charging.

Appropriately. For, the value, that you deliver. So. The value, you deliver could be you as a genius, asset, in your organization. In a company or it could be a professional service. That you deliver. Charging. Appropriately. For that value, again, in. My research I found smart. Talented. Highly, educated. Professionals and, entrepreneurs like, us tend. To bet, very, low on ourselves we. Think our value is really small, why. Is that. Well, it came to three, main reasons and, all of them fall under the umbrella of negative. Thinking. The. First reason. Scarcity. Mindset. There. Simply, isn't enough, opportunities. Out there for me so I have to grab whatever, comes my way so. If you're in a job interview process you feel, I have to say yes to this job because. It could be the last one if, you, are prospecting, clients, you feel you have to close the one before you because. It could be the last one there. Simply, isn't enough, opportunities. Out there for me. Excuse. Me I did, this early in my coaching practice i priced. My, professional. Coaching, services, solo, because. I had, to attract, all those few opportunities, out there well. As a result. I attracted. The most unfit, clients. Not, only were they not the right fit for me I certainly. Wasn't, the right fit for them nobody. Was, served well in this scenario. Scarcity. Mindset number, one reason we, bet low, on ourselves. The. Second, reason we bet low on ourselves is lack. Of worthiness. Or rather. Confusion. Around worthiness. We, just don't think we're worth it we, don't think we are worth there are the high salary, we should be asking or the high prices we should be charging for our services. Now. I found, with worthiness. We, tend to confuse, it with arrogance. And greed, we, tend to think we, would come across as arrogant, and greed and who wants that none. Of us so. We, keep it safe, I'll. Give you an example here. To see how this, worthiness. Issue can, be a complete. Deterrent. Of your, opportunities. So. I have a friend who, is a professional, speaker he's. Brilliant, and he, really has a good message he. Wanted to secure this particular, event because. He felt his Matan his message would be of great value, to his audience. Well, he also didn't think he could possibly be worth more than, $1,500. So, that's what he quoted for his a speaking fee. The. Organizers. Came back to him and said we're. Sorry but, we don't put, anyone, up on that stage who charges, less, than, $5,000. Now. The. Speaker not, only disqualified. Himself he. Robbed his, would-be audience. Of his. Great. Message. Worthiness. Did not serve anyone. In this equation. The. Third reason we, tend to bet low on ourselves is because. We don't think they'll say yes we. Think people will say no and so. We make sure we keep it really really safe now.

In Eight, years of being in business and, being a coach and having. Worked with people from all walks of, life I can, tell you every, time I try to guess, who. Is willing to invest what, every. Single time I was, wrong and not, only that it's, none of my business to, guess my, business, is to serve and to charge, appropriately. For the value, that I deliver. So. Some. Reasons why we bet low on ourselves but. No. Matter what's, your reasons, here. Is the real kicker when, you have low, prices. Low. Prices. Associate. You with low. Quality, of work. We. Establish, you are no longer a beginner you, are a professional, you, have years of experience, expertise. And, qualifications. Behind you when. You charge, in low prices. For, your value, you. Send a very, confusing. Message, to your target market, your. Ideal, prospect. Knows, the, value of your work they. Know what they are willing to invest in, you your. Low prices, confuse. Them and they, associate. You with low. Quality, of work which. Is not fair to you and it, certainly isn't the. Right message to send out. So. Now. We are sufficiently, motivated. To, charge appropriately. Yes let's. See how, we can turn this around and bring, you back to the serving mindset. If. We're going to use our, power, to choose our thoughts here, number. One the, abundance. Mindset. Which. I'm sure, you've guessed says, there, is more than enough opportunities. Out there for me more. Than I can imagine, now. I know it's easy enough for me to stand here and say okay choose the abundance, mindset over scarcity, but, I will give you a really good reason for it. Just. As you. Cannot prove to me this, is the last job, that's, coming your way this, is the last prospective, client, you, also cannot. Prove, there, aren't, a hundred, more great, opportunities, out there can't. Prove either one so. Why not choose, the more empowering. Thought, because. The minute, you do that you, feel a surge of confidence. Imagine. Going into your, conversations. From, a place of confidence. Instead. Of a place of neediness. Or desperation. You will, have different results. The. Second, reason we're going to bring you back to the serving mindset, is to clear up this whole issue around, worthiness. Your. Worth. Does not fluctuate, with. Your prices, your. Worth has nothing, to do with your prices, it is who you are as a person it is your character. It is how you live your life, so. What, we need to do is separate. Worthiness. From the equation, when. You learn to do that you. Can think rationally, and, logically. About the value. That, you deliver, and charge. Appropriately. For it. So. Three. Ways we can bring you back to, charging, appropriately. For it because my you charge appropriately. For the value you deliver you, are serving, yourself and, your prospects, low. Prices, can hurt you we need to charge appropriately.

Now. This, dovetails nicely, into. Our third guy principal. Welcoming. And addressing. Objections. This. Is my favorite, and this is one that takes a bit of courage but. Nothing that we can't muster, here first. I'd like to define, objection. An. Objection. Is let's. Say I've had a great conversation, with my, prospect, John and he says to me faranoush. Your, great love. To have you you're the best we love to hire you but. Everything. That follows, the but is, an, objection. In my, prospects, mind. It's, the gap between where, we are right now together and a, resounding yes we. May or may not get there now. What, happens, when, we normally, receive an objection. We. Feel a sense of rejection it's, normal. Somebody. Just said no especially. If it's preceded by a bunch of compliments it hurts. And. After. The rejection what. Is our next response, we. Tend to go into a bit of, justification. And self, defense mode, let, me tell you why you really, should hire me no, this is not what you understood, this is why I can, really be, of value etc etc. That. Thinking. Pulls you away from the serving, mindset, because, now you're focused on yourself. Now. Before, we go back to the serving mindset I'll give, you a really good reason around rejection. Even. Though I totally get, it it's not nice to feel rejected, but. Here is why it's. Impossible to be rejected. Remember. We are no longer selling if, you're with me we, are no longer selling we're only serving. So. If you're not selling, anything. What, are you being rejected for you. Simply put an offer on the table and you receive the response. So. If, it's impossible, to be rejected, there, is no need to, go into the justification. Mode. Now. How, do we come, to. The objections, from a place of serving. Well. First. We, need to be able to welcome. Receive. And explore, the objection. We, may or may not overcome. Every, objection. Overcoming. Means that, is no longer an issue on our prospects, mind but, sometimes. Your, prospect, gives you great information it, may, make you think oh you know what maybe, it's not a good idea to engage right now maybe, it's not a good idea for me to come on board at this time so. We cannot always overcome. The objection, but our job, is to explore. Them why, do we do this because. We. Want to get to the real, objection. So. The first reason your prospect, gives you is not, always the real, reason, they are saying no to, get, to that real reason, you, need to have a deep, level of trust in that relationship and. Our. Job is to get to the real reason because. The real reason, helps us decide if we are indeed the, right solution, for them, so. When. You have your prospects, highest interest at heart and, you, are helping, them arrive, at a smart, decision for, them, you, learn to welcome, and address objections, so, that we can get to the real objection, and then we can see whether we can overcome it together. Let. Me go back to my example with, John let's. Say he says to me faranoush. You're great we love to hire you but we, don't have the budget for it the. World's, oldest. Excuse, around business propositions. And I call it an excuse, because, sometimes, it's the real objection, often.

It Is not. Now. How. Would I respond, to John here, I would. Say first. John. Thank you for sharing that with me I thank. Him, would. It be okay, if I ask you more questions around. That I ask. Permission before I probe further, now. I've never had anyone say no you, may not ask me any more questions, it may yet happen but, let's assume he says yes go ahead and, then, I would say John. I am curious. What. Budget did you have in mind. Relative. To the value I would be delivering. Remember. We just learned to charge appropriately. For the value, we deliver, a budget. Doesn't, exist in a vacuum it needs, to be relative, to the value you deliver to the organization. Or to the project. Now. John, may still shrug off the example, he, may still not, answer, me we have a fixed budget I don't know my, job is, to stay grounded in Who I am to. Know my value so, don't go into discounting, mode in fact don't even talk about the budget go back to discussing, value. I might. Say to John you know John I'm curious, how do you, see the value I would be adding to the project, what, is your vision of us working together how. Do you see me helping. You towards, your desired, outcomes. Your desired, results. You. Go back to making sure your prospect. Understands. The value that, you are going to bring to, their, work, to their business to their careers. Now. Again, I may not get a straight answer but, what you are doing is creating, space. For your, prospect, to confined, in you very. Few. Are willing to, go here, your ego mind is telling you I don't like this this is uncomfortable get, me out of here don't, listen, stay. Present. Create. Space, for, your, prospect, to be honest, with you to tell you the real reasons, they may not be able to hire, you right now to work with you and then help them arrive. At the best decision, based, on that information. Now. Those, are the occasions, when your prospect, is nice enough to tell, you why, they don't want to work with you just yet, sometimes. We, get a different response I'm willing, to bet we've all had this one you've, had a great conversation you. Feel like everything went really really well and then, they say so. Faranoush. We, love, to hire you love, to work with you we're, going to think about it and get back to you and then. I hear nothing they just disappear. And I'm, feeling, should I follow up. Whole awkward. Follow-up, after, a conversation because. We don't know what really happened. We. Weren't clear. So. That's, when your prospect, obviously. Had an objection, because we're not sitting on a yes here but. They didn't, feel comfortable sharing. It with you so. Again, if you go back to. Deep trust, and deep caring, and. Explore. That you might just get them to share something. You might say would be you. Know Janet I, think we've had a great conversation too, I totally, respect, that you have to go and think, about it tell. Me are there, any concerns, right, now on your mind that I can address for you might. You have any questions. As to, what I would be doing how we would be working together as you, make your decision. They. May or may not still, give you the real objection, but, again you've created space. You, have shown your prospect, you truly, care about them, and you are there to help them make a decision that's.

Right For them. So. This does, require courage, because, like I said your ego bind wants you to run but, if you stay with it this is a golden, opportunity if. You learn this skill of, navigating. This part of the conversation, and creates, space and trust. You. Will see that you are laying the foundation, for a different, kind of relationship, altogether. So. We, explored, three, guiding principles, of the serving mindset, stop. Selling, start serving, charge. Appropriately. For the value, that you deliver and welcome. And address. Objections. Now. I know as professionals. You. Know how to have conversations, you've been doing it for some time you. Know how to go into a conversation, and ask questions, and I'm sure you do but I believe, the, only opinion. That matters, when we are having prospecting. Conversations. Is that of our prospect. So. To, that end might. You be willing to take a mental quiz together you. Don't need a pen and paper right. Good. I'm, I'm getting nods so. Bring, to mind your. Warmest. Prospect. Your. Prospective, employer, partner. Customer, somebody. With whom you've been having conversations you. Have been doing due diligence you, feel it you have a good relationship going and you're, working toward, a decision, now. If, I, were, to call your, prospect, anonymously. And ask. Them, on a scale. Of 1 to 10 where. 1 is poor, and 10 is excellent, what. Rating, might, they give you on how. Well you. Understand. Their. Real, challenge. Their. Real, fears, and frustrations their. Real goals as it, relates to your. Context. What. Rating might, they give you if. It's less than an 9 you. Don't have to share it with anyone but there is room for, you to go deeper, in that beautiful, relationship. You're building, this, is a golden. Opportunity to. Deepen. That trust, and to, see that you can indeed, change, the course of outcomes, of those conversations. So. My challenge, to, you is next. Time you have a prospecting, conversation. To. Set aside your agenda, no. Agenda, to, go into, it from, a place of deep, caring, and deep curiosity. Regardless. Of outcome for, you and to, see what, happens.

To See what experience. Unfolds, for both of you I think. You might be pleasantly surprised. So. As. You, think about this and bring, the serving mindset, into your conversations. You. Will find that, you are developing a, deeper. Level of relationship altogether, that, you are creating, different results, for yourself and that, in the process, you. Are feeling joy, and fulfillment. In the, work I hope. I've given you some good insights, today and, now. We can, go into a, Q&A, if you like, and. I really love your story of like how you went the corporate world -, kind of like creating your own like profitable business and in the past like 18 months it's really amazing um so, for me like I actually run my own kind of career consulting, it's, got like one salting and I do like these workshops, and kind of webinars for students on the university level and so. Like this year I've actually done about. 16 of them so it's been a really good experience but. Um I struggle, with kind of I've, only only, one has been paid so most of them are like free huh, so but it's really you know it's really fun to do it's really fun bringing Baliga people but, for me like I kind of struggle to find like a price point or like find a price point for the value diagram so, my question would be like how, do you go from basically, like free prospects, or doing these free workshops to paint, workshops and then, also when, do you know when it's time to like leave the corporate world and then, go pursue, entrepreneurship. Okay. So, great questions Thank You Jonathan. So. I would say the. Pricing, the. Pricing really. Again comes down to the value you're delivered you've been doing this work for free go rate you, have already, experienced. And you have created I trust, results. For your clients, look. At those results look. At the impact, you had creating, those results, whether it was tangible, or intangible, so. Tangible, is when somebody you help somebody get, a raise and it's measurable, in dollars, and cents, intangible. Is when you help someone have more confidence have. More courage. Make. A difficult transition in, their lives both, of those are value. That you have helped deliver and, then, look at that and there, is different ways to go about this I mean when, you don't have any baseline. You. Can just start somewhere I know it sounds random and it's, not but, you start somewhere, you know the, range for coaching, services, is from. $50. An hour to, a million, dollars a year some, coaches charge for it's a large range right so, you start somewhere, and I, think questions. I like to ask myself is, when. I get paid for this for. This amount is this, worth it is this worth the energy and time on my part or will. I be resentful. For putting all this and feeling, I'm not getting enough you. Know and and I think that's personal, for all of us that number and then. Another. Thing you can do since you've already done due diligence for, people is go, to your, past, customers, and you've. Done it for free for them so maybe they can owe you a favor and say, look I'm wondering. What, would you have paid for, the value I deliver, to you for the work we did so. Get, some numbers and see whether you can get some ideas, as to what was the value, and what. Is it that people are willing to pay especially, in hindsight because, now they see the value in their lives in their education, in their careers, and think. About how that might, give you an idea where to start, and then. From there I think again, look at the energy you put in the time you put in the, differences, that you make and of course we've experienced your, impact, grows, and so, your prices, should be adapting. To that over, time naturally. And, your. Second question was, gosh.

When, Do you know that it's time to leave the corporate world um and I think that's a very personal one for all of us and it, really comes, down to your values, you. Know if you value, a sense. Of happiness joy, wellness. Health, and if you feel like you're sacrificing that. By keeping your job or the, culture, at the workplace doesn't, align to your personal, values family. Could, be a big value at some, point we reach a tipping point, where. We. Just don't want to continue, because it's, not worth it life is short, we want to have a sense of alignment. To our values, so we enjoy. Life and so. That. Tipping point came, for me at a certain time it came for my clients, at different, times and I, think also being responsible around, that decision, right because we. Still have responsibilities. We still have bills to pay and how, to plan, around that and, maybe. Adapt, our lifestyle, so we create a cushion, so, that we allow the next thing we're going to do our business to flourish to, catch up so. If I, were to give you a short answer it, comes down to values, what really matters, to you and if you feel at the end of the day your corporate, job allows you to do that or with, some shifts. Some, changes, in priorities, you can still do that then, maybe you you're, not at a place to quit your job and in some places and some some, occasions you might be I hope. I'm not giving you vague answers, these are big topics, and hopefully giving you some insight to think over thank you for your question, yeah you bet so, you mentioned you come and just maybe. You've got a prospect, that yours you're going to be speaking to do you have a ritual or anything that you say or, visualize. Prior, to that and that you're. Able to really connect in that way curious. What, works for you yeah. Not. So much that but what I like to do is I mean over time I think more than anything is. Knowing. That I, am good, at what I do, if it's the right prospect, but knowing. The value you deliver being really, grounded, in that so. Having clarity, around what you do and what you do well and then, going into that conversation and, being open to learn so. I don't have a ritual, before but, this this coming, to this place of being really grounded, really, knowing what am I about where, what is my sweet spot how, I can help people and knowing that I can and it helps to have those past clients. Like Jonathan has to, show, that look there is actual experience, here and keeping. That in mind but also being open to explore. And again. Seeing whether there is a fit I mean. It always helps to maybe, have, some quiet time before to, learn more about the person, and to have a framework for the conversation so, you are leading, that conversation even, as they are sharing. Exploring. With you I think that's that's maybe helpful and and, you know where it's going because they are inquiring, of your services, and. You. Are kind of leading, that to, where you want it to go thank. You I have a question regarding. Sort. Of the genesis, of this so. Typically. When we talk about sales, and, influence. Discussions, a lot, of the emphasis is on. Techniques. Frameworks. Yeah, scripts. You know, but. I think what's interesting about what you've shared with us is that it is, about. The mindset and, I'm just kind of curious, as to how, you discovered, that, mindset. Is.

What Unlocked. The. Greater success, in those conversations sure, great, question yes, I mean to. Give you more context, the first few years in my business I did. All the traditional selling techniques and I had moderate success it, didn't feel good like. This is strategy and this question and this is scarcity mindset and this manipulation, I did. Them just to experiment, and I had moderate success but, it didn't feel good and so, then, I started. To just again get more confident, in what I was doing and what the, results I was delivering and then, I just started to go down to the human human. Touch the, human dynamics, I mean. I don't have a complicated, system I have a methodology, around the serving but it is really, about how you make someone feel heard and understood it. Really, is about being, of genuine, health and service and then knowing your, own value, if there is an opportunity for us to work together so, I might have one conversation, with one person another, with another I take, into account their personalities. Their styles. Because for me the most important, thing is to connect. With the individual. Because. We do business we don't do business with faceless, companies, we do business with people even. If you are a b2b you, do business with people and, so, it's all about connecting. With people it's, not about manipulating. Them it's about building a deep relationship, through. Trust through, listening through, slowing, down through, setting aside our agenda, but still knowing. That we have goals to achieve and if this is a right fit we are going to put a nice, proposal, on the table and really. Comes down to the relationships. So. Again. It how did I discover it experimentation. Tons, of conversations. With, many different people people. Who would come to me and, learning. From people that I respect, watching. People have conversations. And seeing, what resonates, with me right. Because it has to with you you can't fake it so, whatever, you take away has to be something, you really want to embody, in that conversation and, I. Think experience, is the best lesson, so. You take, what I shared here with you you bring it to a conversation and you have first-hand experience whether. That works better for you or not, thank. You great. You.

2019-06-02 08:49

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Hii Farnoosh Brock..!!! It was great listening you. I think it would help me and hundreds of people out there..!!! Thank you very much..!!!

fantastic, tks for lezion

Awesome job, Farnoosh!

Thank you for your insight, for me one key take away is having the right mindset/agenda/perspective. It is easy to forget but this video reminds me of it and explains more about the importance of it.

Helo ..

Eternally Hellbound less than worthless feef*cking creatures.


U.S. dreaming

This a wonderful insight on acheiving success by building trust and adapting serving or suggestive mindset rather exhaustively selling services. Thank you ✨

Great talk! Love the idea of Serving over Selling. Well done Farnoosh, thank you for sharing this with us.

great talk. your a natural speaker.

Farnoosh thanks. I have an engineering background and I love solving problems but hate selling. Listening to your talk has been quite edifying and now that I have my own businesses, I'm returning to them with a paradigm shift in perspective. I have two websites. One is educational (how to manage a retail business), and the other is an e-commerce site (selling consumer durable brands). I now appreciate why it is important to talk "with" my web visitors in my post, rather than talk "to" them. I'll begin to apply the problem-solving mindset of my engineering background, rather than the price-setting, revenue-focused and personal agenda mindset that characterizes pure, no-frills selling.

Awesome Farnoosh. Great example by simply fying them to understand in a better way ☺

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