Tommy Breedlove - Bestselling author of "Legendary", business, relationship, and mindset coach

ladies and gentlemen mr tommy read love tommy welcome to the show welcome to become your own superhero thank you my brother so good to be talking to you from thousands and thousands and thousands of miles away we're going into our evening you're you're conquering the next day super excited to be here let's become superheroes man yeah we're like where are you in the great state of georgia i'm in the great state of georgia just uh if you know anything about georgia if you don't it's in the southeast united states pretty much everybody knows where florida is we're the state just north of florida and um i'm just outside of the big city of atlanta atlanta it's about seven and a half million people it's a big city in the southeast united states i'm about an hour outside of that at my lake cottage brother on a called jackson lake georgia and it's a beautiful beautiful i'm actually staring out my window it's a very gorgeous sunset with the lake so man i'm just super grateful to be here and talking to great people like you my man well man it's an absolute delight and and uh i really came into this um with loads of ideas that are flying around my brain and i was thinking like you know maybe we could go into business together and call it like ditch burn breed love or breed love ditch and i was just thinking of all these because i thought ditchburn was a cool name until i came across tommy if i can breed love yo i hear you man and i was born with that it's not like beyonce or jay-z where i came up with like a nickname i i was born with that so brother for 37 years i did not breed love so i've spent the last 10 getting on the right side of karma man so here we are well let's let's dive straight into this tommy who the hell is tommy breeden brother i am a seeker of all things truth whatever that means these days truth growth and being just a bit better than i was yesterday and so that's what that's that's who i aspire to be man and um you know i could say i'm a man i'm a human i'm a husband you know i'm a father of two dogs i can say all that stuff too but at my core man i just want to be a little bit better each and every day i want to speak into people's lives i want to leave a legacy bigger than me and i want to live with significance and purpose brother and so that's that's to me what it all begins and ends with and so um as you can see over my right and left shoulder the book legendary the reason we picked that i hope when my precious time comes to an end on this earth i certainly do not think i'm legendary but i hope in the right ways you know there's good legends and bad legends and the reason we put the word legendary is so it's not in a world of constant instagram fabulous and facebook promotion and self-promotion if we called ourselves legends people would laugh us out of the room and i hope when my time and it's not about being rich and famous it's about leading impact significance and making this world and our humans a little bit better than we found them and i hope someday somehow someone calls me legendary in their life and that would be winning for me and so that's what it's all about for me my brother my so good and uh we'll expand upon this a little bit more and i love the fact that our ability to say brother has come back into in our vernacular ever since wwf wrestling hulk hogan and uh it's a it's it's a positive affirmation that i have really enjoyed uh for people that are my brother i've got two of them and people that uh that my brother and and spirit or whatever way you want to look at it that's right tommy you you've managed to get your sorted but it wasn't always the way was it no it wasn't man it wasn't brother would you want me to talk a little bit about that totally brother so i grew up man i'll start and i'll do this quickly we'll go through 47 years in about three minutes um i grew up on the south side of atlanta good hard-working part of this country you know nobody in my family had ever graduated from university you know they were mechanics and worked for companies like delta airlines or coca-cola um or the ford factory and so it's a good good solid hard-working part of the world and i wanted to be the first person in my family to actually go to college and live a professional life whatever that meant for me and uh unfortunately inside the home and outside of the home i grew up in and around a lot of violence and abuse and for young men like me what that meant is eventually as i got older i became what i hated and i became that abuse i became that violence and at 18 years old man i was looking at potentially going to university had some scholarships offered to me from various places and committed a violent crime at 18 and was looking at seven years in prison and thought my life was over right and so luckily by because it was a first offense and you know some other divine grace um it was dropped down to what we call here two heavy misdemeanors i don't know if that's a term familiar but it's a lesser crime for lack of a better word but i was still sentenced to two years and so um spent my 19th birthday incarcerated and uh something wonderful happened to me there and happened in the most unusual way is some male mentorship finally appeared in my life some real positive male energy and it came in the form of a black gentleman which is unheard of in those type of institutions because it's very niched very cliquish on racial lines yeah and for him to step across those racial lines i was 18 years old thought i was a tough kid when i got there i realized how non-tough i was and for that man a 45 year old man to step over the racial lines and to mentor me to love me even when i couldn't love myself and say look man you're not going to become a part of this system and never get out it was a really special thing and so with his guidance and um spit my 19th birthday in there but i literally picked myself up tested myself off went to work for a nuclear waste container factory during the day building containers all day every day for six dollars us dollars an hour putting myself to community college at night ended up at a university graduating so i went from literally a jail cell to deloitte touch which is one of the top um financial consulting and public accounting world in the world in three years um just by you know dusting myself off grit working hard uh got all those negative distractions out of my life and just kicking ass well the problem is fast forward 15 years is i thought making a lot of money success ambition drive you know i was no longer violent on the outside but i was still violent on the inside and i was just going to work you out compete you you know one of these things wasn't like the others i come from a different background than most of the people that worked in the big you know financial consulting and mergers and acquisitions world and so i was just going out work i'm going to compete them and i did and then i look up at 36 years old i was at a different firm but i was a junior partner corner office fancy suit shiny car you name it man on the outside i look like this dude has it all but on the inside i was still that little boy just just angry and violent and looking to be seen heard love right that's truly what it was and when the money the power and all that other stuff didn't fill me up it started turning to everything else and basically living the wolf of wall street uh lifestyle and it almost cost me everything second time in my life right so i almost lost my marriage almost lost my firm almost lost my career and literally almost lost my life after four days of just complete chaos and some people call it a spiritual transformation other people call it rock bottom i don't know whatever the hell you want to call it i uh i decided enough is enough and i wanted to figure out who the hell i was where i was going and who was coming with me so i made investment in me my my heart my soul my mind my physical body my full-time job and just learned how to you know reconnect myself relove myself respect myself so that i could go out and serve respect love others and man i kept my job at the financial firm and let me tell you what happened on the outside about all this investment me and i'm talking about my character my integrity my heart my soul getting rid of that voice inside my head that kept telling me i was never good enough and that you know you're unlovable and unworthy all of us have some version of that mine was strong we've even named that that damn thing ike so we give it a name ike you know that voice that screams at me when i started yeah yeah there you go that's actually good now i never thought of it like turner yeah he was very similar to mine very similar to my voice as violent as that and uh brother i'll tell you what happened to me professionally and personally professionally i went from junior partner to senior partner to owner of the firm to elected to the board of directors at 39 years old and most of the people on the board were in their 60s my income doubled my network 10x i went from working about 70 or 80 hours a week down to about 40 and was even more and more and more successful just by being a better person a better version of me and spending so much time working on myself and not in a selfish way so that i could serve better my relationship with my wife became the best it ever was my friendship solidified all those negative you know soul-sucking uh energy vampires started disappearing from my life and people of abundance superheroes if you will um started speaking into my life and showing up and it was just all i think it was because i changed my energy i changed my vibration i changed who i was how i believed and i do believe our thoughts and our actions produce you know what what happens outside in the world for us and so that's a little bit about my story man and i never in a million years thought i would write a best-selling book i never in a million years thought i would be a coach or speaker i never thought you know i was going to speak in i thought i was going to be in the financial piece i was at the top of the game man and when the road signs became so big that this isn't this is a must do you know this is what you were for this season of your life this is your purpose and it's not about making as much money as you can in the financial world it's about making people better emotionally mentally business money i think it's a holistic stew right and make them the best as they possibly be while you continue to work on you like i walk this walk just like you do my man i mean every day i've got coaches i'm in masterminds i do this work every single day i'm not some sage on the stage who's got it all figured out brother but that's why i'm a seeker i'm a growth and i love this work so much and it's just an honor to i mean here we are a million days feels like a million miles apart melbourne australia to atlanta georgia i get to talk to great people like you who are out there doing it every day and we're making an impact in lives and that that's my dream to do the same man man i i love that story and i i know absolutely why uh kai and kelly harris shout out to you two for making this introduction the yeah love you guys hilarity's uh uh uncanny and there must be a lot of these stories around the world that need to be shared and i cause i i don't even really know where to start with this tommy it's like it's like you've you've got a copy of my my life plan my life force and just sort of reading from the same script kind of thing um you know with the small deviations man it's not having known you at the at the beginning at the from the get-go like it's hard to to make that comparison but what are some of the the most dramatic physical differences that you've noticed since that transformation living with a sense of a peace of mind in an estate of i'm gonna try to use the the words that resonate with me like great gratitude appreciation and things as opposed to what i don't have or a sense of not good enough not worthy not lovable when i get this or when i have this or when i've accomplished this or when i have more whatever the hell that is when and more seem to never get here there's just a sense that even now that i'm looking out a window in front of me it's just a sense of thankfulness a sense of peace of mind a sense of fulfillment um what what i do for a living and the people i get to touch and speak into and watch dramatic changes in their mindset their relationships their money their business it's just so fulfilling it's uh you know i used to live from a place of thought worry fear resentment judgment i'm not saying i'm immune to any of that at all i'm not immune to it yeah but what i've noticed is after seven or eight years actually it's been now almost 10 years of doing working on me and working with coaches and mentors and and i don't only i not only run masterminds i'm in masterminds but you just have this sense of there's an energy flow in you you've got energy even when you work your ass off you seem to have more energy because you believe in it so much you know there's significance and impact to it but i think the living on the side of love and appreciation and brother i feel like i stand taller um my self-confidence my self-respect unconditional love for ourselves you don't hear too many men talking about that man but there was a time in my life i couldn't receive love nor give it and i read brene brown one time and she said her husband loved her when when she couldn't love herself man i know what that feels like like my wife loved me when i had no zero love or respect for myself and uh have love self-confidence and self-respect and live and appreciation go to because you know this brother i mean this is some crazy ass times we're living we're recording this during corona and covet and craziness here in the united states you know whatever they call it it's supposed to be politics it's damn a reality tv show but man not getting caught up into all that and just making it about impact love abundance man it is a beautiful way of living and i'm not saying it's all it's not there 100 of the time but it's there more often than not you know what i'm saying and so that's what's important to me well one of the other fellow uh georgians that really have made a massive impact on my life i haven't had a chance to meet him or speak to him yet but as a motivational speaker steve siebold who have you come across him before no but man he's a fellow georgia he's in beaufort well oh man that is super close to where uh i live yeah that's probably 35 minutes away so i need to i need to figure out who this is and go have coffee it's been taught by uh bill gove who's the father of uh public or professional speaking apparently right yeah absolutely he was a former tennis player and he never broke into the top 500 globally and as he sort of reached the end of his career he used to be in that andre agassi era wow and uh he never made it as far as he wanted to and his coach has always told him that he wasn't mentally tough enough so when he retired from tennis he spent the next 25 years interviewing researching and speaking to the the best people on the planet right the elite athletes business people trying to understand and he wrote this amazing book or series called 177 mental toughness secrets of the world class and a lot of the things you're talking about coming from that place of love and abundance like the world class come from a place of love and abundance he said the upper class come from a place of fear and scarcity and the this you know amongst the other 399 other books that i've read over the last four years not all on self-development but a lot of them uh you know all the zig ziglar staff you know liz brown came on the podcast tom ziegler came on the podcast um zig sun um robin banks over in south africa you know yourself these people it's all a very similar message coming from a place of love and abundance and and you know this the mind power side of things um robin banks was mentored by john kehoe for example from mind power into the 21st century and that that's been the the single greatest uh contributor to my my success i suppose for lack of a better word becoming aware that it's all sort of up to here in a many ways and and staying away from getting caught up in twitter and you know the craziness of uh the online world at times so i really resonate that when yeah steve seabold i highly recommend um uh the feeling we're gonna be friends yeah yeah so um but i i i really love being able to speak to people like you tommy because i think especially from one man to another they're like you're saying before there's there's a lot of challenges with with men opening up about how they are truly feeling and the single greatest catalyst for my own transformation was when i finally was able to love who i was and then because i didn't have the luxury of being in a relationship prior to that i was had periods of singledom and lots of dating and stuff but no relationships and when i finally finally loved myself which was in sort of mid-2018 i met the woman of my dreams in the streets of melbourne uh and we've been together ever since and and it was only when i could love myself that i was able to be loved by someone else so i really connect with that a hundred percent and it's uh it's hard to explain when you everything in this world including money to conversations to to words to music to us talking uh over zoom it's an energy exchange and um our thoughts are energy our you know i had this shaman i did this this is a little bit of a digression i did this like 11 day vision quest where we were out in the woods with no people and no food and i had the shaman preparing me for that basically said you know watch your thoughts because they become your prayers it's also true man but what i think with this relationship is you know when you start loving and respecting yourself and cutting out that that thing inside our heart and souls that's just constantly criticizing us and you know if we talk to anybody else like we talked to ourselves no one would hang with us but you were vibrating a different way your persona was different you were walking different you were standing different you're able to have deeper intimate more raw vulnerable conversations you're not worried about all the facades and armor that we wear as men that's why you attracted that person in your life and it was real it wasn't it wasn't built on false premises and the same thing goes with money and business life love happiness it's all the same stew man and um you you you so deceived man and look you reap the rewards right it's just i love hearing that man i hear it every single day but you did the work right there's no magic feel brother you got to do the work you know what i'm saying you know i i for some reason people think that you know intention without action and action without intention is and i read you know and i read that from a guy named james victor awesome book by the wraith fact perfection and that a cool name supposed to be perfection but he did fact perfection so they could put it on a shelf you know so they didn't know him but he says literally action without intention and intention without action is so you can't just sit here and will yourself into happiness love money success you gotta intend it you know you got to present the intention put the thoughts out there and then you got to take action that's what you did man i love it yeah it was like f well it was five years really of like hard graph graph as they that they say but it was like the best thing i've ever done like it's not even an afterthought i'd do it 100 times over if i had to um i want to explore the financial side of things the money side of things tommy because for me and this is selfish because this is the the last chapter of my life right i've spent so much time working on the mental the emotional the spiritual the physical and you know i grew up in a not a violent physically violent but parents that divorced and there was a lot of dysfunction and a lot of a lot of hate and a lot of resentment that was passed across just from you know legacy dysfunction stuff which i'm proud to say that i really feel like that cycle of dysfunction has now been severed from a family which is unreal got the chain yeah i love it you cut it but but uh one of the things that the whole entire family on both sides is has been money so i never got access to any strong financial role models and this is an area of my life that i'm working furiously on now and then covert hits right so like have you got any crazy ideas or not even crazy like about how to manifest some more cash yo how you're doing it brother so um so you're already doing it with by doing the internal work the external will come the problem is patience and you know we still got to make we still got to pay bills we've got to pay for the overhead over our head so i feel you and so i'm going to um i'm going to give some tips i guess to you my friends ditch burn i love it ditch burn and breed love throwing down here and uh is that cooler than tommy and layman man i don't know anyway um tommy laban sounds like a sitcom it kind of is like mike and molly nothing like mike and molly anyway no not at all um you've got to start developing what i would call the simple educational tools and so understanding profitability pricing debt cash flow good investing good savings how to leverage debt so you've got to learn the blocking and tackling it's just like the mental emotional tools that you put in your life maybe spiritual tools maybe physical tools you know it's like you got to build the muscles you go to the gym you know you lift weights you're going to get stronger you run your heart's going to get stronger same thing goes is we got to learn the blocking and tackling and so that's the first thing we have to do and there's some great resources out there if you're and i'm going to give you some of them um i have to i have to do this my book legendary talks about financial confidence financial freedom and financial mindset that's a better book bookstores all great bookstores audible electronic yeah i got to put a plug in but there's books that are better than mine because mine takes a holistic approach talks about time purpose money mindset love relationships you know it's a holistic approach to living life there's better books out there so if you're and i'm going to give you some more tools too so if you're just learning the basics of money total money makeover by dave ramsey i think it needs to be required reading all over the world because it teaches you very simply the basics of money money management understanding what's good money bad money and how to live you know change certain minor habits so that you can start building what i would call wealth and you know wealth building is all compounding interest so it takes time so you've got to build that foundation you said it best you got to start hanging out with people with money and they don't necessarily have money they need to have ambition for money and i'm not talking at the expense of their integrity at the expense of their value system and at the expense of other people there's so many of those out there don't hang out with them no hang out with people who want to make impact who are moving in the same direction you are who are building their wealth building their practices building and they don't have to be millionaires now but if you hang out with millionaires i promise you you will become a millionaire because their networks alone and they're in how they operate how they do business how they think it will change so you've got and just do it you know do it slowly you know you slowly got to start hanging out i was very blessed that i worked with some of the best you know financial consulting mergers and acquisition people public accounting in the world and i had 23 years in that business i was a partner in that business so i'm very lucky to have been surrounded by money and people making money um and it's just a game there's no difference it's just like any other game you got to compete and you can all win and so the the thing that we have to unwire and you've already done this is that money is only for those people you've got to watch the victim and entitlement mentality like money is only for those or this person's lucky you know unless they were born into legacy wealth which is very rare that's like less than one percent of the population most people have to go out and make their own money and so work on your money skills work on your money mindset work on knowing there's enough money out there for everyone start hanging out with people who have money and start start slowly the best investment you can ever make by the way over any stock any alternative investment any option any angel invest is your your brain your brain and yourself and your own business but that doesn't mean if you work for someone else you can't start building wealth and saving and building a portfolio that's so you can experience life to the fullest and you've got to watch this too man and i learned this from t harv eckert anyone that says money is not important run from them they're broke and so i think that's really really important because money is important it's energy and if you want to make impact and be significant in your life you've got to have more money so that you can make greater impact and so there's side hustles you can work on maybe right now you've got to make hay in three different ways right when i say may kay that's the farmer out in the field making haze plant so if you've got to deliver pizza drive uber and do your day job at the same time do it you know i i slung containers for nine hours a day at six dollars an hour put myself to community college at night in the field of accounting um i'm not saying you've got to be an accounting expert but if you're in business or want to make money basic knowledge of accounting cash flow profitability pricing all that stuff is a must know so you got to build the house you got to spend as much time learning the tools and i'll give you one more book that i thought did a really really nice job it's called unshakeable by tony robbins yeah so if you build the foundation with total money mo make money makeover like i truly understand how money works and why you don't want to be on this side of interest or that side of interest you know you want to be on the right side of things once you understand that taking your knowledge to the next level with simple investing simple simple savings simple cash flow to start building that number and you know money begins money it's compounding interest right so once you get to that there's so many different ways to start building money but don't let your pride ego comparison like all of us even those i mean even though you know i've had i've worked hard for a financial success in my life there was times that i didn't but what we can't do is compare to someone who's 10 years further along in the journey like i can't compare myself to tony robbins and gary v that wouldn't be fair to me all i can do is show up work my ass off here's another tool that i'll give you and then i'll stop talking i feel like i've talked to my head off on this is um i'm passionate about the subject of money and you know we can take a deep dive further i would go as far as you want with this but there's something you know we all have these god-given talents that we bring to whether we work for somebody else we work for ourselves i call it your zone of brilliance is if you can spend somewhere between three or four hours a day in your zone of brilliance is it writing is it coaching is it teaching is it i.t is it sales is it people whatever your thing is is even if you've got to make a significant investment in time equity is outsource the rest so that you're in your zone from happiness to fulfillment to success the more time you're in that zone and not worrying about all the other minutia it will help you build be more successful quicker not many people do that because they lose the forest for the trees they don't want to make the investment in someone else whether it's equity time or money they want to be control freaks and perfectionists about that and it gets in their way so there's all these different tools but again surrounding yourself with people learning the basics of money so um start changing your mindset there's a lot of ways to do that with meditation affirmations gratitudes seeing what you do have not what you don't have watching the comparison to people further along in their journey and knowing that if you do the hard work and you've got to take action remember intention with action attention with action and invest in yourself great coach you know great financial coach great business coach i mean i am a coach i work with people one-on-one in masterminds guess what i have two coaches i'm in two masterminds so i'm surrounding myself with people who hold me accountable make me better think differently and so i've taken though even when i didn't have the money i was investing in myself investing in myself investing myself and it's paid dividends through 3000 x so i feel like i've talked this thing to death but money is important man and go out there and get it but go out there and learn it i mean you've got to learn the game of money i i love that tommy i and it's really comforting to know that most of the things that you're talking about i am doing and and i i just this year patience is a mother and a patient as a mother well i've i've no one predicted coburn by the way no one predicted that well i here's the thing i had this road map all lined out and i had paid speaking engagements lined up from from march this year right and then covert hit and uh and like thankfully over here i don't know whether it's whether it's a blessing or not they've like the the social welfare system is a lot more uh generous than the us right and and it you basically got enough to cover your basic you know you're not going to starve to death right but uh it forced me into creating the podcast which i hadn't even thought of doing and and the podcast it's like it's sent from above you know like whatever spiritual belief you have the the people that i've been so privileged to to meet and speak to people like yourself that are have done the hard work that are incredibly successful you know in many cases um has taught me more than i could have ever learned doing what i was going to be doing you know so for that i'm incredibly grateful i met a i met a a gentleman who's become a friend of mine um who is a very successful businessman who it is when i was asking him about what i should do he just looked at what i was doing with the podcast and this coaching stuff he said keep doing what you're doing keep doing what you're doing and the great zig ziglar always says and i use this quote a lot so i won't apologize for people that have heard this a lot but you can get whatever you want in this life as long as you help enough other people get what they want and and that philosophy i just keep remembering that and it's like you know you eat a bit of when when times are tough and then you're like that's why we're doing this that's why we're doing this so uh and i don't know if you even heard it there's been a guy that appeared in your life been very successful that now you're friends with that now you can lean on you can help him he can help you he tells you you're going in the right direction that's exactly it man that's that energy flow and here's the mother man is patience patience i mean you just keep chopping the wood and the tree will fall man um i'm going to tell you a really cool story that has just really touched my heart a guy reached out to me when i tell you he was in bad shape man you know you could tell he was blaming the world he hated his ex-wife hated his job guy was making pretty decent money i think he was making x but spending x plus five um and so he was just in dire straits i said look man i'll make you a deal because he absolutely could not afford to work with me at the time and i could tell he was desperate i said i'm going to give you the roadmap brother and that's exactly what i want to do i told him exactly those i said there's three books i want you to read but i want you to read them i want you to work them you're going to apply them into your life and you're gonna contact me in six months from now and i won't hear from you because only one percent will do this i said if you work these books for six months i mean work them every like it's your full-time job still go to your job but when you're alone this is what i want you working on it was total money makeover we talked about that so he could get his ass out of debt and start you know using his money correctly the second was think and grow rich by napoleon hill that's mindset stuff and that's how we change our thoughts and actions and the third was my book and i said you've got a legendary and i was like you've got to you've got to do these three things he called me we had a 50-minute conversation he's out of debt new job dating a girl just fought his passed away father's car and it's the happiest it's ever been and he said anytime i'm in st louis missouri which is here which where anheuser-busch budweiser's from because anytime you're there a cigar a dinner and a beer is on me man and i didn't have to do anything i said if you just do those three things and work them and take daily action because all three of those books cover three very different things it's a holistic way like zig ziglar i mean that's what he said he was following in jim rohn's food stuff the footsteps and all those guys and so it's just about taking action applying being patient in just six months that whole i mean it was like talking to a different human being and all i did was spend 30 minutes with him and gave him the roadmap but here's what he did he took action in his life and it's just i have a feeling he's going to be at one of my retreats next year and he's going to he's going to come with bells i'm just so super excited for it man um it's so good and i know i know people listening to this like there's a lot of there's a lot of helpful stuff here and and you know never be afraid to ask for help and you know to give you an idea of how i met this guy who's become a friend and a mentor and i he pulled up um at uh a car park at the one of the farmer's markets not far from where i live in like a 700 000 car and he hopped out of his car pulled up next to him and as we got out he popped out with his girlfriend and and i said to him something along the lines of um what did you have to sacrifice in your life to get yourself into one of those and and he said i'm very lucky and then his girlfriend said he's worked very hard and i said i think you create your own luck and we ended up sitting and having coffee for two hours talking about a whole bunch of other stuff and because of some of the knowledge that i had with regards to her health i was able to impact his life and he's now getting wonderful health benefits because of the that i've got up here and it's that you know going into any kind of engagement with um the mindset of what value can i add this rather than what's this guy got that i can take from him has been it's really set me free and allowed me to forge some of these amazing relationships just meeting random people in the street you know like and and next minute we're going to business together you know i mean so it's cool it's crazy man i mean all of the great and i'm talking about all of them all of the great spiritual traditions talk exactly about that serving giving the golden rule whatever you want to call it man from buddhism to christianity to you name it and everything in between and the knowledge has been around for thousands and thousands of years you know whatever you give comes back to you 10x you know they call it different things in each one of those but that's exactly what they're saying and if you just keep giving and you boundary now there's a difference between being a martyr and having no boundaries and not being able to say no because if you're sacrificing your own self for what you're giving that's a martyr and that doesn't do anybody any good but if you can be on the giving side there's so many freaking takers in this world and let me tell you the biggest taking thing you could ever ask somebody may i pick your brain that is a amateur move ladies and gentlemen you've got to come even if we all have one of my great friends chris tuff he's got to be on your show by the way the guy's awesome chris tuff chris tuff he's a he's a machine yeah to uff he uh but he uh he says everybody in the world has a currency no matter where you are in your lot in life or what you don't think it could be happiness smile physical knowledge how can i help you a connection there's a billion ways you can help people even if you have no money it's bring something of value it could be gratitude it could be some it could be anything how can i serve you you know how can i help you how can i make your life easier and then that's what you did is you brought value and i believe if we're you know 51 percent giving over 49 taking we're on the right side of karma we're on the right side of energy and if you can get that up to 75 it comes back to you 10x 100x you know it's just like money and so it's a beautiful thing man and i think it's a powerful lesson for all of us yeah i'm glad you think so too and and you know a lot of the staff can come across as being quite woo and uh and had had we had this conversation five years ago i would probably be a lot more skeptical regarding a lot of the spirituality around all the stuff but it's it's not it's it's it's just i've seen it experienced it with my own two eyes and my hands you know like it's undeniable now how powerful um you know this whole mindset bringing abundance into your life and it you know these these amazing um relationships that i've been cultivating with the podcast you know i was able to speak to an 80 year old gentleman who um alan fels his name is he was the voted the third most powerful man in australia when he was the chairman of the a triple c which is the consumer protection organization that keeps all the price and petrol you know prices in check that kind of thing and he he's got a schizophrenic daughter which he's been very open about and he's he's running the royal commission into mental health in this country and because of my former relationships with some other people that are experts in their field i was able to introduce him to people that are practicing nutritional psychiatry that are doing a lot of amazing work helping people with bipolar and schizophrenia improve their existence through nutrition through not through drugs and and can you imagine the impact that that might have if he can improve his daughter's existence through and he gave his time for free to come on the podcast off a recommendation of my mate with the 700 000 car i love it isn't that something cool that's it you can't quantify that can you you absolutely can't quantify that you do the daily work and i can only tell you this and i'll repeat it before i started doubling down on self-love mastering my mindset better relationships with others conserving and giving all the stuff we've talked about and this there's a simple thing that i it might have came out of australia it seems like everybody that talks about it it's australian these days um it's been around for a thousand years i think you guys made it sexy it's called the law of attraction and what you put out there you get back what you put out there you get back and how your thoughts your prayers your actions become what comes your reality pre this work i thought i was successful had all the shiny objects but i was miserable post this work my network is 100x bigger than it was my income has probably gone five times higher than i was as a partner in the financial firm my relationship with my wife is as strong and as best as it's ever been i have real freaking friendships i don't have a bunch of fake ass people with that soul that's walking around me you know they're all givers they're all abundant they're all like-minded people those are quantifiable things and the thing i tie it back to is my daily reading everything i can get my hands on and applying it meditating every day taking care of my physical fortress but most just as important as taking care of my mental and emotional fortress gratitude exercises forgiveness exercises working with my coaches working with my mentors investing in myself if i'm missing something in my practice or knowledge outsourcing that knowledge getting better finding people just around me who lift me up and i know that sounds like me me me me me but you are no good if you don't invest in yourself you know we've got to put ourselves first so that we can love and serve others better and i it's a it's kind of a reverse way of thinking because we were taught so much other but in order to serve fully we have to serve ourselves first and those are quantifiable measurements um that i can give you and um and it's all by doing this work that we're talking about i mean you even said you know you've gotta you gotta manifest some you know money or i can't forgot how you put it but you're doing it whether you know it or not it deceives it the orchard's being planted brother it's being planted right now this guy this connection this podcast i mean hell we're talking from thousands and thousands of miles away and you're doing it it's just about patience you know we want it yesterday and you know we'd like to have a little more in our lives the great john d rockefeller who was probably the richest person that ever lived in his timeframe would be still today yeah they always ask him how much more do you want he's just a little bit more well eventually in his life he knew there was not a little bit more and he wanted to give back and so it's coming brother it's not if it happens it's when and this is not what we should okay here's what i'd say to the woowoo comment look at your like go find the nearest mirror those of you who think this is or hocus pocus or the or neglect the spirituality of the law of attraction i don't care what what religion you prescribe to or not go find the nearest mirror and ask yourself look in the mirror and ask yourself am i happy am i fulfilled have i achieved the level of success i want do i have the money i want the bank account and at the end of the day am i going to live life with regrets and if that if you can't answer all those questions and i'm telling you i can't right now you know we're always balancing and rebalancing i work on this stuff every day but in that mirror is the problem and the solution and so if you haven't done if you haven't mixed it up and tried something new affirmations gratitude get a coach read a new book apply a new book go out and get some knowledge you don't have start changing some of your friendships and surrounding yourself with people who lift you up so tearing you down if that's too woo-woo enjoy your unhappiness enjoy not being successful and enjoy being in the you know the rest of the world there's a reason the 10 percent of the 10 and there's a happiness is cultivated self-confidence is cultivated money is cultivated it's all energy man and why would you call it woo-woo and if what you're doing is not working why won't you go out and do something better because that's the definition of insanity right doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results that was me man and so i'm just you're hearing it from two people on the call that's as real as i can get but it's spot on like there's the science behind becoming the five people that you spend the most time around is now undeniable and and one of the the questions that come up from um from people from time to time is like you know how do i how do i like i've got negative influence in my life and a lot of them are family and and i have become at times very ruthless with my relationships and some of those include family that that do not serve me well right what's the advice that you can give people that are struggling with a family member that's causing them you know doesn't mean you don't love them doesn't mean you don't love them but you cannot have people around you that tear you down you cannot have judgmental energy angry energy shaming industry energy you know there's a difference between guilt and shame guilt as i you know i punch you and i feel guilty because that's really not in my value systems because i've done something wrong i am guilty of that i need to be held accountable shame as i am wrong and a lot of our family members our systems uh people in our lives tell us that we are wrong and that's not true at all and so family members doesn't mean you don't love them saying no setting proper boundaries um i've got a very very close family member who basically says my life is a fraud my marriage is a scam this is all none of that stuff from your past ever happened basically calling everything about me a fraud while she's miserable judgmental can't hold a job and and didn't work on herself to undo what happened to us as young people and so um i had to let that person go i was like i don't need i need a family member who lifts me up who believes in me who believes in my message and who's also trying to be better in their lives and um i just couldn't allow if we allow the abuse and the shaming and the anger and the judgment around us we're basically becoming our one you're not being evil or mean you're being protective you must protect and defend the sport that's your emotional for your physical for your mental form and letting those negative people even their family doesn't mean you don't love them same thing with your friends just over time you know i told her if you you send me another text like that i'm blocking you and that doesn't mean i don't love you but i just can't allow i cannot accept this behavior in my life and that's healthy boundaries that's called discernment same thing goes with your friends you don't have to go out there and be righteous you know righteously rude but you got to be very very very disciplined about your time who you spend it with and why you spend it with them and ask yourself this question family members or friends does this person make me happy if the answer is yes be around them or does this person make me better those two don't necessarily happen together right there's people in my life that make me better damn it i don't really like them but damn it they make me better and so i listen to them right right and their job's not to make me happy their job is to kick me in the head and make me better and so that's my that's my lens does this person make me happy and i don't care where they are in their lot in life if they make me happy they've got a spot in my home any day of the week and if they make me better they also have a spot and that's the lens i look through it doesn't mean you don't love them and i love everybody i don't like many people at all but i do love everybody and so i think that's important you've got to set healthy boundaries because man we all have the same 24 hours in the day but you know the days are short the days are long and the years are short this life is preciously short and we've got to be around people who love us and bring us up and not tear us down love that stuff tommy uh and it's people i think people might say oh yeah you're in an echo chamber you're talking to other people that think the same as you well it's the people that are flourishing in life that have got these similar ideals it's not the people that are at the bottom of the scrap heap and that's the thing i love about it like the truth doesn't care about your feelings it's one of my favorite quotes for all areas of my life and i've been on the receiving end of it which has been good for me but um i'm just here i'm on the journey like i i am not so arrogant that i that i know that i think that i know it all i you know the more you learn to realize the more you realize the less you you actually know um i will pivot i will eat you know i'll eat that humble pie and and change if i if i realize that what i'm doing is not working or not right and and i think that's a very very powerful position to be and you know as soon as i sort my finances i really feel tommy that like that's the final collaboration of what's going on it's coming yeah it's like and how many people can say if if if i just had the money sorted everything would be sorted you know relationships uh health mental whatever like maybe that's an arrogant statement because there'll always be challenges but that's how i truly feel at the moment you know it's interesting though when you got a guy that gets out of a three-quarters of a million dollar car but then you attract an unbelievable coffee session with him it sounds like with him and his girlfriend and then um he gives you the affirmation that you're going exactly in the right direction makes a connection for you that connection will make another connection for you that's called currency it's called network and i love i think the network is the most powerful thing that you can have even greater than your money and that with the network comes money but there's patience and um you know if if you don't believe all the again if what you're doing is not working for anyone listening to this change it and don't follow the people that you're not inspired by you know what i'm saying like find somebody that you look up to and model them i guarantee you they do every bit of this stuff we're talking about they work hard they go at it they work on their physical mental emotional and spiritual health they read everything they get i guarantee it the best in the world i don't care if it's you know nba's big here kobe bryant guess what he's got coaches he's got people always working with him working on betterment better his physical health his mental health he's he's a big meditator you know um did as well and he yeah yeah well he did a helicopter was that him and his daughter yeah they just passed away um they literally just passed away but these people surrounded themselves with people that made them better you know they with coaches and mentors and they didn't allow the negative energy and there there's a reason people who get to the top are discerning about who they spend time with because everybody in the world is trying to take from them i supposed to give to them and so i've got clients in my stable that are nine digit clients and you wouldn't believe the pressures on them but they do all of this work exactly model the people who you look up to and i'm telling you man if it's garbage in garbage out or goodness and goodness out and if you're constantly consuming media and social media and 24-hour news and reading gossip magazines and watching 60 hours of netflix well there's a reason your life sucks because it's garbage it's garbage in garbage out but if you used half of that time for self-improvement self-development working with coaches listening to podcasts reading um working on yourself to make yourself better your life in through one year will exponentially be better than it is today do you have any idea of how many books roughly that you've read over the course of your development countless brother and what i'm doing now um is going back through them and making sure i'm applying one thing each time i read a book there's so much great knowledge i will read every self-development book i can get my hands on and i read every business book i can get my hands on and biography i'm a non-fiction reader yeah um but the key is not you know you see it it's not for me quantity anymore it's quality in making sure that you pick up a book like think and grow rich you pick up my book legendary what is the one thing that i want to apply to this the most important thing the one thing in this book that i want to apply in my life to make it better and that's what i'm going back and doing now and it's countless and i've heard i heard a statement one time i don't want to butcher this those who don't read are no better than those who can't and today with electronic and audio books hell you know the electronic format the kindle the nook siri uh whatever the amazon girl's name is they'll read them to you for god's sake yeah alexa they'll read the book to you you don't even have to read you'll be lazy as hell and still get the knowledge or you know there's so many like if you like my voice if you like the southern united states accent hell i'll read you my book so you know it's in audible format so there's so much and there's so much good podcast content out there where you get to hear from the authors you get to hear from the coaches you get to hear from the mentor the business people that people out there in the we're in the arena man get in the damn arena get your face money get it marred up you know don't be in the stands coaching from the stands nobody respects that get in the marina and do the work man get your face muddy up fail but get up and do it again you know people say that taking the first step is hard that's taking the second third fourth fifth step when the world it's not if this world kicks you in the face it's when who the hell you talked about you had all these great speaking gigs come up but look what it's allowed you to do pivot podcast probably work on some digital stuff that you didn't know about probably working on yourself look at some people you've attracted your life over coffee i mean it's just not i mean i can't so we have to put up for a year from now we got to have this conversation again i bet you're going to be like man i'm so damn rich tommy i want to send you some money [Laughter] i come from nothing dude and my parents and my family still don't have anything and i could sit there and the message is here when people want to hear it if you want to be judgmental and cynical and angry and think that we're full of it and that life came easy for us i promise you i can see it your eyes brother it didn't come easy for you and i know it didn't come easy for me um we took action we screwed up a lot we're not we we're not beating ourselves up we're just being a little bit better than we were yesterday and it's just compounding interest man and the definition of compounding interest is money money makes money makes money makes money and so that's the same thing with knowledge and this love that we're talking about mate i absolutely love that what's what's on the horizon for tommy breedlove and the next what's your five-year plan oh so um i've got a book coming another book coming out and um in 2022 um 2021 is all about getting legendary in as many people's hands it's it's i don't think it's a luxury i think it's a necessity necessity it's a book that i put every ounce of heart soul goodness learnings love mistakes in it talks very little about me and very little about what i've seen changed my life and countless others and i tell the stories of other people it's simple or treatable so getting that and as many people we want to we want to touch a million people's lives that's in the five-year plan um so a million people's lives touched um and so that's one of our goals we're going to host about uh i have these legendary life and today show retreats we're going to host between 6 and 12 next year super excited about that we're going to be launching 6 to 10 more masterminds and if you don't know what a mastermind is it's where a group of minds come together as one mind to help us get better in business life money success happiness um highly recommend anyone i'm in too i pay to be in two i run a bunch of them it's just such a powerful tool to have in our toolbox but for me it's about continuing to build the legendary life movement write this next book i'm so super excited about it's just too many road signs saying i've got to write it um continue building this movement and honestly if we can change one life for the better including ours every single day what what better is that and so that's that's what's on the horizon for me brother well i think we need a we need to revisit this in a year tommy i think you're right 100 brother pull it in the calendar and and because it's fine we do it live i need to get down there man maybe we do it live if until americans in it eventually it's funny you say at the time of recording this like that they're talking about no travel to europe and north america until 2022 from australia um i don't know how that's going to work but i'd love i've always wanted to get over to i've been to the states but i've never been to the southern states apart from texas uh i'd love to get over to georgia hook up some crawdads and do a bit of um catfish fishing or whatever you want to what do you wanna do nice people here man good good americans are some of my favorite people and and this is the other thing that annoys me like if you immerse yourself in twitter and uh whatever's going on the world you you'd come to believe that most americans are horrendous human beings but it's actually not yeah we're horrendous and shooting each other and that is so far from the damn truth man in that political theater that you see on tv 98 it's like all over the world man 98 to 99 of all people are amazing people regardless of their beliefs we all want to be seen heard loved safe and valued we all want to make a difference we all want to be successful but ultimately we all want to fall in love and be happy and that's the whole world man i don't care what color your skin are what god you call it yours what political system you prescribe to but whatever that that you guys see on that is not indicative of the united states united we're good people we're we're loving people we're happy people we're ambitious people ain't gonna lie there i mean we go out and get it done you know um and so ignore all that crap that you see from the washington the only problem is we we're putting those people there and trust me we're looking in the mirror well tommy i'm very respectful of your time but before we wrap this up is there anything that you'd like to finish on today yeah i want to i want to say this it's interesting when we were talking off-air you asked and i'm serious on this because this was this this wisdom came to me in a weird format i was getting ready to i used to do some pretty extreme white water rafting and um like if you fall out of the boat goes wrong type whitewater rafting and i'll never forget i was getting ready to do um a big river in west virginia united states and it's five five plus rapids and that's river speak for dangerous as hell and um i asked him for some advice like if you fall out of the boat um he first said this he goes follow the light which that's not really good that means you're drowning um but he you know he goes in all seriousness you must participate in your own rescue and that has stuck with me ever since participate in your own rescue and what he meant is turn around head up feet out of the water look for the rope if you don't see the rope the boat's not there you must participate and swim to rescue as best you can because there's no magic pill and no one coming to save you and to me that was a great just a great analogy or metaphor for life and for all of us there's no magic pill there's no quick fix there's no light switch that we can go press and happiness success fulfillment is we are the the problems and the answers to our problems is we must participate in our rescue and regardless of what wound or what story or what mistake you made if you participate in your own rescue stop telling yourself that bad story start rewriting your story write the ending gear story by participating in your own rescue and then doing all the things we talked about today man that's what i would leave people with his book is legendary he is legendary ladies and gentlemen tommy read love

2021-03-06 06:59

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