Stress, is it what you think?
![Stress, is it what you think? Stress, is it what you think?](/pic/stress_is_it_what_you_think_/Z2xlOGpaV25ENWM_.jpeg)
Good. Morning everyone and. Welcome. To today's. Presentation, and, I would say when. I start my talks usually, that today, is the first day of the rest of your life, and. That's because, it is. And. It's your choice what you do with it I like. To have it with. These and not. Dis-ease. So. Today we're. Gonna have a look at mine what, stress. Is and. Really. Is it, what you think. So. You'd probably have a whole, bunch of ideas of what stress, is for you. First. We're going to have a look at what. You think it is and. Then. We're going to have. A look at where it comes from and so what, it really is and. Then. I'm going to give you a gift. And. That's what. You can do about it once you figured out what it is. Anybody. Here not like give it's, good. Because otherwise I was good to say when we. As. I said when, we get to that point you're welcome to leave. Don't. Tell me what do you think, stresses. Lack. Of clarity yeah. That's. The symptom. Like. A focus. So. Things. Are doing yeah were you expecting to. For. Many people, that, say it's they've. Got too much work, but. For some people it. Might be they haven't got enough work and they're. Bored and they actually love, a challenge. And they're. They're sitting there in an office with really nothing to do and that can stress people out. Time. Pressure we've mentioned. Relationship. Issues as. I mentioned earlier. It. Can be the children. The. Parents. Money. Many. People think it's not having enough money. But. For some people it's having too, much money and not knowing where, dawei investing, what's the right, place. To put it and is it going to work is it gonna do what I need. It to do. But. Can you trust that advisor to give you the right advice. Yes. And. So on so these are all outside, things. That. People think. Causes. Them stress. So. What solutions, might you have for all those things, well. How do you deal with your, stress what do you do. Dead again good one. Burying. Your head in the sack. Outsourced. Yet. So, a lot of these things fits, in these. Categories, some, of them don't but. We. Need more time so. We have these time, management. Strategies. And how to fit all this stuff into. The. Time that we've got because you can't have more time we've all got 24 hours, in.
Some Cases 50 days. So. What what. Is it that we're putting into that time. We. Might think oh I'm gonna need to put more effort into it you. Need to you know get get these things sorted and you. Know, exercise. Can be a one that I'm not saying it's a a bad, thing. But. That's really, implies we need to put some, effort into something to. Fix it. Might. Need to throw money at it. You. Need. Some more energy. When. You think about all these things does it make you more stressed or less stressed. More. Stress thank you sir. It. Needs to be more rational. However. Stress is an emotion. And. You cannot. Rationalize. An, emotion. Maybe. You need more information to, figure out how to deal. With this thing called. Stress. But. I am going to give you a bit of information. But. It's making sure you've got the right information and, actually, when you were, in the era where we can get all the information that we want at our fingertips with technology. And. Yet stress, has become the. Norm, that. Doesn't make it normal. So. Getting, more information hasn't, made us any less stressed. So. What's going on. Anton. Said family. Ain't vanity. Is doing the same thing over and over again expecting, a, different. Result. And. That's what's been happening with stress. This. Is what I noticed, in my journey when. I started, in 1993, what, I was dealing with was repetitive strain injury it. Was the thing of the day, every. Row has its disease. Or syndrome, symptom. It's. How I treated, lots of people with RS I have. Very good results and time went on and RSI wasn't the thing anymore. But. I was still getting all these symptoms by. 2016. I realize I'm still getting people with headaches, and back pains of depression, anxiety panic attacks. Breathing. Issues after, xxx. Richtofen. I thought. It. All boils, down to the same thing, stress. They're. All just symptoms, of, their. Stress and the body is. Reflecting. It in a, different way depending on how they are processing. That. Information. Every. Disease has, its particular. Pattern. That's what I call disease language. So. I call it repetitive, stress injury now and that's. What I deal with you. And. I see it. Walking. Around in the shops and, I. Call it spending. Time. Repeatedly. Exaggerating. Small, stuff and, for the clever people around the room you'll realize that smell stressed. Because. People, are going on about their, kids having the wrong. Socks. They're not paired up properly the. The, kid that wasn't holding on to the pram, mats, mentioned, the issue. Of the, baby in the bus. In his Taoiseach that wouldn't put their. Weddings on, it's. Small. Stuff. Sometimes. You might have an argument and. That's. When you know your stress because she come back in do you see, was. That about I, remember. Having an argument with my husband, about. Five pounds, in, my accounts. It's, my cans why has he got a problem with it, but. His history was the stress of not being able to leave the bank, where. He worked until it, had balance to the penny. That. Was his stress and, I was glad I recognized, that. So. As I said stress might. Be the norm that doesn't, make it normal and, it doesn't mean you have to live with it. So. You. Had a thought about what stresses and. If. It's. What. You think.
And. What. You've done. Hasn't. Worked. Then. Was it, what. You thought it was. And. Therefore. What. Are you gonna do to. Deal with it. So. I mentioned this all this more, on. The. More stuff we have. The. More stress it seems to cause. An. Actual town also said that peace. Which. I think yeah, hands up if you think that kind of equates to the opposite of stress. Some. Nod some hands right, you're. Still awake you following instructions, good. So. Peace, cannot, be kept by force. It. Can only be achieved by, understanding. So. I'm. Gonna help you understand, you and. Stress. Hopefully. So. I'd like you to take a moment and you can write this down on a piece of paper if you want. What. Is. Your, stress level on the scale of not detain. I'm. Not going to see this so that's fine you can be completely honest with yourself. Yeah. Might depend on the day of the week just, what is it right now. Because. You can only judge with. What. You well right now. And. How. Committed, are, you to. Dealing. With your stress level. I'm. Knock down a mountain. I can, see the sticking. And. If you're not at a nine or ten, then. That might be just, a piece of the puzzle that you're missing to deal with it. If. You're not completely committed. To. Solving the, issue, then. It's unlikely, that, you'll find the solution. If. I had a magic wand what. You. Have I. Even. Have a second one. So. I'm gonna wave my magic wand and I can change one thing about you. What. Would you like it to be. Okay. So. I've waved my magic wand I bet wait, both my wands. Something's. Changed about you. How. Does that affect your stress level. And if it doesn't they. Know you really commit it you're dealing with your stress level. So. These are just the kinds of questions that I ask people because. Once, you get some understanding of what's really going on, then. You can actually deal with it. And. I've asked this one. Before. But. Some of you may not have been there who. Are the five. Most important. People in your life. If. You can only find three that's fine. Okay. And hands are. Who's, put themselves on that list. Yeah. Good you you've heard me speak before oh. You've. Had a once card. Most. People, don't, so. If you are not on, the, top of that list. At. Least as. Much. As everybody, else, rotates. At the top of that list, so, you might be looking after parents, looking after children. Husbands. Wives partners. They. All, take their turn as to who becomes priority, if you are not at. Least on that list, as much as they are in. Turn. Then. How are you going to deal with your strengths. Because. A lot of it is to do with. Getting. Your, needs met and if, your needs are, not prioritized. Then. It's not surprising you're. Getting stressed. You. Know what is stopping you what. Is stopping you. Dealing. With your stress. Time. Yourself, yeah. Is. It too lazy. Is. It. Yes. Exactly we're, getting deep, what. Is it that really stops, us you. Know we. Have we, haven't got time to do these things that's. What we were looking at earlier. It's. Something, much deeper. Lack. Of awareness yeah, yeah. See. A very good one. I'm. Fear. Of. If. It's the thing that you really want oh, the. Thing that you don't want you don't want the stress. Why. Would you know then, cackling, and. Actually that's what's happening whilst, we're focusing, on the stress we have no idea what at least we want instead. And. If you don't know what you want instead. It's. Very hard to achieve I don't. Want to go to London. It's. So pretty where, do you want to go then I. Don't. Know well, just. Get in the car drive. You'll. Get there. So. We need to know what there is instead, of, and. This is why people are doing the same stuff over and over again expecting a, different outcome. They, want to get rid of their stress but the only thing they're focusing on is their stress so they're getting the same outcome. So. My. Definition of, what stress is. It. Starts with it's not, it's. Not what's happening to us it's, not all that stuff outside it's not how much time we've got or how little time we've got or you. Know whether we've got the money or not the money it's. Our. Response. To. What is happening. And, it's a feeling of lack. Of control. That's. The fear. It's. A bit like a rollercoaster some, people love it some people hate it. So. There's stuff that you like and you just flow. With it there's stuff that you don't like. And. Then. That's. The stress. So. It's the feeling of lack of control. But. Sometimes you, like that so there's an extra bit to it and, it's.
Believing. That. When you're not in control. You. Don't feel, secure. And. We continue, to want to feed that security. With. More. We. Believe that having more will, make us more secure. Are. You with me yes. I. Know. I'm going deep and it's early morning. It's. The point at which we freeze and I'm, not talking about the fight flight, freeze which. Is part of the normal, reaction to stress, together. That thing of I can't. Make a decision oh. You. Do business it kind of stops. Because. You're. Not even flow anymore, you, all know when oh yeah you know things are going great it's it's. Flowing. We. Are, mostly. Water you know that you've told us that. And. When. Things don't go well we, behave as if we're ice. And it's, when our head in the heart a body. And the mind and, no, longer talking the same language. My. Job is obviously, to help unravel all. Of that. So. I then. Ask myself well how did people ever get to that point why. Do we freeze. Why. Do we lack the clarity, to be able to make decisions when. I head in the heart. Yes. That's what's right for me right now even if in 20 years time that proves to be the wrong decision it, was right at the time. It's. Often because people haven't got a big picture or they've lost sight of it and. It's. Because they, were not on their. Priority. List, to. Create that big picture for themselves. They've. Lost track of their values and their principles, and they might be in a. Job that they hate and they continue, doing it. And. They allow themselves to, be bullied. By bosses. Or. Colleagues. Because. They haven't put themselves on the top of that priority list. They've. Disconnected, from their feelings as. You said because it's too. Scary. It. Involves, doing, some digging some rooting around and figuring out what's. Going on without feelings but our feelings are just emotions. And. Emotions are just energy, in motion and you need, that motion to keep. Flowing. It's, living with tolerances. Little. Stuff every, time you see something that isn't quite how you would like it to be. Davina. Will know my database, isn't quite doing what I'd like it to do and. Every. Time I come to that point of wanting it wanting, to do something although I end up with the result I want. There's. Always the thing it's really it, really, is an easier way to do this I'm sure but. I. Haven't yet tackled, it but. I've now given Davina, the job of tackling it. So. It's living, with these things and it, can be simple, things like. Leaving. Cupboard doors open, like. Children, not putting their laundry in the laundry basket and, it just goes on and on. It's. Amazing. What we live with and we don't resolve. But every time we see it it. Takes. You right back to that. Stress. Level. And. Because, we've become human, doings. Rather. Than human beings. Because. While we're doing we don't have to think about all this other stuff. So. What's this. It. Kind of is a magic button. Yep. It's. A Rand to it. Because. People say yeah I'll deal with it when I get around to it, and. You're at the bottom of that list, when. You get around to it, so. Right now it's going to be the time. When. I'll give you my, gift to get round to it. So. Stress. Isn't on the outside. Then. Is it on the inside. If. All this more, isn't. Working, how. Might les, be. So, you've all set you like gifts, good. So. When somebody, gives you a compliment. Are. You really comfortable with that or do. You kind of get a bit. Because. Every, time somebody, pays, you for the job that you've done they're giving you a gift. And. If you've got any. Hesitation. About receiving, gifts and, allowing, that to flow into your life. It's. Creating, stress for you. And. How. Does it feel when you say no. For. Something or somebody. So. That you can say yes to you. People. Have talked about you, know wanting to have time to go and play the, golf or. Do. Their running. But. They're too busy. That. Means saying yes to you. But. They often mean saying no most, people don't like saying no we're. Not brought up just. Say. No so we say, yes and we just keep saying yes to more and more and more until we get. To the point of overwhelm. And. We don't have to. Anybody. Here. Can. Think of one more, than one thought at a time. But. They all come in a sequence. We. Can only think, of one thought.
At Any one point in time. Get. Your own novel I was. Worried about that one. And. Who, has time to breathe. Good, so you're all breathing yeah. Great the road a lot. So. My. Gift is if, you, could, only think, of one thought, at any one point and, you've got time to breathe then. You're going to be able to use my gift. Einstein. Also said some, great fan, laugh. It's. Like a bicycle, to. Keep your balance you, have to keep moving you don't, want to get to the point of freezing and. If. You don't believe that, I've. Brought one of my wobble boards. Which. I use for my clients to. Help improve their balance, because. Not being stressed, involves. Having that balance and it comes as much from what's going on in your bodies what's going on in your money. So. You can have a little go on that. And. So I like to bring. People happiness. And. That's. By. Embracing. Your fears. Leveraging. Your strength and taking positive action, because, we need to keep moving. And you, need to know how you want to feel. You. Know what stress is like but what do you think that you want in stairs instead. Peace. But what does that actually feel, like. So. I'd like you to. Notice. The. Speed of, your. Thoughts. Fast. On the game they've probably slowed, down a bit. From. When we started. Fast. Are you breathing. What's. Going on in your mind. This. Is what I call square reading and. It's the. Main tool that I give my clients when they first come to see me because. It does, work. Magic and that's why I wave my magic wand. It's. Very simple, you breathe in a square. You. Breathe in for a count of four, you hold four captive before you, breathe out for a count of four and you hold for a count of four, so. I'm gonna. Go. Through it with you so. When you're ready breathe, in two. Three, four. Hold. Two. Three. Four. Out two, three. Four. Hold. Two. Three. Four. In. Two. Three. Four. Hold. Hold. For, continued. I. Said. I continue. And. Now. And. Now notice the speed of your thoughts. You.
2018-05-02 17:11