I FAILED EVERY GOAL I SET LAST YEAR
Hi everybody happy, new year I hope you're doing well and, that 2019. Is going super, well for you so far I am very, very, jet-lagged. I got back to Canada, on the. Night, of the 30th, and yeah. Every. Year I kind of start off in the same way where it's like the end of Christmas. Jet, lag. Not, good sleep, a lot of caffeine this, number two today but, also. In the same ways every year our, JRuby, your only last year I want it I want to make it a tradition now anyways, I did it last year and this, year I'm gonna do it again where, I reflect, on the, year that has passed to a review, talk about some of my favorite things and moments, things I've learned also, I want to watch the. Video I did last year and reflect. On the goals I set and, see whether I, accomplished. Them or not right. Now from what I remember I, did not at all I'm pretty sure I failed everything but we'll see and then, also discuss, what I want to go ahead with this next year my goals for next year and what I want to accomplish in. 2019. So. To. Start off my, absolute. Favorite, moment I have my channel up here looking. At my videos and going through things but I know without even looking from the top of my head, my favorite moment has, to be getting. Engaged and marrying, the man of my dreams we've. Been dating for over five years now and on June 26, he proposed, to me. And. Very. Quickly after we decided to suddenly. Elope, on November. 16th. So, both, things happened, on the. End of 2019. And I, couldn't be happier with the way we did it it was very us it's. Very personal. Yeah, it was really just about us being, in love and everything. Turned out great and our, families really supported, it and we're happy for us another, big moment was getting the keys to our apartment here. And starting renovations and also, moving into our apartment in Toronto. This. Year was all about setting the foundation for. Our future, lives together future, family and. You. Had just just. For. So long I've been traveling to so many countries and never really, felt a sense of belonging I never had a permanent home I was always living in model houses with many different girls even like sharing bedrooms, of many different girls all, over the world, which. Was great but, at, this time of my life I was really ready to find a place where I call home for, a long period, of time and you. Know do it up the way we like and build her her dream apartment and that finally. Started. Taking place this year and. Also, moving to Canada helped. Me to spend a lot more time there, I got to spend the whole month of December with my family, spending, my birthday there which, was another big moment I turned 30 this year and I. Got to celebrate it with my family which I haven't done for 10, years now so, just having them all together and we chose a Chinese, place so we could share, some of, Tom's. Culture with them and have them try some of the foods they tried a lot of things that they've never had before and they loved it those, were just really, top things on my head a lot of big moments at the end of the year but going back to the beginning of the year what did I do.
I Think, this year, I dabbled. More. Into. Makeup, again I had, not for a long time whether it, be just like regular makeup or. Tried. Following nikkietutorials, makeup. Which was a totally, different style makeup then I was used to different. Eyebrow, trends. You. Try them no, special. Effects makeup. And. Even like some of the DIY, fashion stuff. I. Had a really good time this year tapping, into my creativity. And even. Though I'm not by. Any means a good makeup artist or, her that makeup at all I tend to actually stick to one thing I'm a Sagittarius and, I like change with a lot of things like travel. My. Jaw that's I'm it like modeling, in YouTube it was good for me cuz I had to change it up all the time but in my personal life I, like to stick to the same thing like I've. Had the same hair forever I. Which. I changed this year which was a big deal to me. I when. I find a makeup, that I like I said I tend, to stick to it for a long time so, before was a big idea Dali makeup, for like four years now it's like this look it didn't, change at all this year but. I did sort. Of play around with, makeup. And special effects, and stuff like that and that helped me to really tap into the. Essence, of me so when I was little I took art. Classes I, did a lot of drawing and, like sculpting, and everything, from the age of like 3, to 11 that, was always a big part of my, youth, and I gave it up in high school and I started modeling. So getting. Back into just creating, stuff and like coming. Up with ideas and putting them into work has. Really I. Don't. Know it's, helped me reach, op into. My. Authentic, self and, just, feel. Really good and always just love to play around and create things and seeing you guys try it out, and have fun and take pictures has. Been amazing. And this year we did the, garden. Eyebrows and what. Else the. Flower. Base hair was another big one it, was a big year for floral, stuff but. That was a lot of fun this year was also a year where I reached, out and stopped being so shy and. Tried. To meet up with people that are different than me and just. Talked to people more and listen more and, experienced. Things that I haven't, experienced before I started out actually at the beginning of the year with the Chinese New Year's taboos with crystal. I learned. About a lot about Chinese, New Year customs, and traditions with. That video I your, face brings fortune, young. Bean how we gonna be in NATO I come from a good yeah oh okay. But. More. So with. My foodie, series that I did not. Only did that bring, Natalie, and I a lot closer because she started working, with me after, Chinese New Year so almost. A year now and we started this foodie series pretty much right away and you can kind of see our growth throughout. This series and like how we work together and, like getting to getting, used to.
This. Relationship, that we've built and how to add. Enough shoot things so. That series brought Natalie and I a lot closer, commencing, coming to me right now. Happening. How. Do you feel, finish. The 30 series. Yeah. You're, fun yeah I have fun cuz some of the places, if it's not a pretty that ring we do that probably. I won't know where is it. I'd. Like. Secret. Is that all. Those restaurant, that we went to I actually, go back to it to like later by, myself or with my family, so it's not that we just recommend, it to you guys and then no we don't go that but I actually went, went, back there like very often, it also helped me learn a lot about Hong Kong in this place that I'm living in now and the, culture, and the people here, not. Only from the foodies but the restaurant we went to not, only as well she helped me a ton she, was a the, star of that series she helped me to like book places and find places and broke down all the like details. And book the foodies so, yeah. It just it was a really memorable series, that helped, me. And Natalie to grow both separately, and together and, just. Really helps me get my feet here in my bearings and learn a lot, about Hong, Kong. My. Hair I finally. Changed my hair so. My. Hair has, been a security blanket to me and has not changed like I've never like fully fleshed, it or dyed it as long as I've lived I've, only done highlights, and it's always been around the same sort of length I was, so scared to make. A drastic change to. My hair for so long to the point where I click fated to you guys so many times I wore. Wigs and. I just really really really wasn't sure three, months ago, so. It towards the end of the year I finally took the plunge and change. My color cut, up off my hair, all right ready yeah, go right here anywhere you want doesn't, matter. You. Can do it. Hey. And. That's where it's gonna sit I just, have to fix it up I felt, so liberated, and so. Fresh one of the main reasons why I didn't, change my hair for so long was I was in the modeling contract since I was 16, and my agency's, always, controlled, my. My look and since. I am only 5 7 I'm on the very short end of the modeling of scale and my look is very commercial. Not edgy or high fashion, I was, I was geared, towards the commercial, type. Of modeling and they wanted me to keep, like the long natural, looking, hair that sort of thing so every, contract I signed my. Hair always had to stay the same and so I never changed it I think, in the past I was so busy with. People, making, my, life choices for, me whether it be my modeling agencies, or like listening to people's opinions. Through. YouTube, or Instagram and, whatnot and this year was the year where I really. Felt. More confident, and really thought like what do I want what do I want to change or. How. Do how, do I feel about this or how do I want this to look and I, just played around with things and I really, enjoyed it my best friend got married I got to be one of her bridesmaids witnessing. Their marriage was amazing. And seeing, all her family again cuz I grew up with them but, I haven't seen most of long time since I left Canada and. Seeing. All the cultures involved was really. Really nice also, my sister Carly, and Joey had their first son named Gordie and seeing how much she's, changed has, been really. Amazing. He's. Just changed. Her in the best way possible and, seeing. The way she is with him she's such an amazing mother and, all. The insight she gives me now that we want to get pregnant just the way she tells me like things she's done and motherhood we're, really bonding on that and she almost seems like my older sister like I really look up to her now, and I also really look up to Alec she's another amazing, mother and we got to. Baptizing, emotional, you have to baptize, Dexter. And Tom, and I are its godparents, this year and. Every year for the rest of his life but that happened this year so. That was really amazing next, I want to quickly move into some, favorites. Makeup. Really. No fashion, so, I'm gonna go collect some of the things that I've used all year and have been top, on my cabinet.
Or Closet, or, anything like that makeup. Wise. Definitely. Gotta give a shout out to my, main love, Kylie. Jenner cosmetics, in the color charm, it's a velvet matte lipstick, and it is definitely the, color I reach for most throughout, the year and the color that I get the most compliments, on or people asking what is that color it's almost always this and with. This I use the Kylie Jenner cosmetics. Lip liner in candy cake and this is my go-to color the, mascara, I used all year and never change was a majolica. Majorca. Lash expander, long long long this, has little fibers, in the mascara, which, I, don't, know if I've ever told you guys this I feel like I have. I, thought. The mascara, was bad at the beginning when I bought it I thought I got a really bad one with someone's use, flashes, inside, so I threw away a couple and, then I realized no these are like little fibers, and they extend, your lashes. So. It's almost like getting a last lash, extension. But, just in the mascara and then it comes off at night when you remove your makeup and you don't have I know, I, felt a bit annoyed when I had fake, lashes because things get stuck in them and I feel like I can't clean them properly and then finally, the, jeffree, star highlighter. And platinum, ice. Specifically. The color ice-cold I really, love I use this every time, I do my makeup on the top of my cheeks on the tips of my nose I use it an inner corner of my eyes to brighten, right. Here my forehead, I tend. To use this like on days like this for my natural look I use it instead of eyeshadow, like I just pop a little bit here and like yeah. That's all I use so. I love this this was a staple whole year fashion. Wise I think this year was the year where, I went back to basics, so, I attended to reach a lot of the time for just a basic pair of jeans and t-shirt, my, favorite jeans were my revolve. Of gold ones which are in the wash right now because, I wear them so, much and I always forget, to wash them kind of just constantly wear them so, they're finally in the wash so, I can't show you guys on but I think you know what I'm talking about I can probably find a million videos where I'm wearing them, those. With, a t-shirt either, a cropped one or a full one just a basic color. For. My foodie series I wore, that all the time and that. Were like a knitted sweater I found a lot of this, vlogmas where I was making videos every day I tended. To wear just a lot of chunkiness I bought like three four, five years ago so. I realized. This year I really, want to invest more in those stable, pieces that don't really go out of style you know the perfect jeans that t-shirt good quality t-shirt, and. Those those, chunky, knits or turtlenecks, that you just wear every. Year and.
I Know I'm getting older I think we're I just want to go for those classic, items that will stay in my closet, and last forever. Also. Speaking of jeans I really loved these, ones, there's, our, mom, jeans I wore, these hope December, pretty much moving. On to, books. I think, one. Book that made a big impact, on me was this one it's a skincare and, cosmetic. Ingredients. Dictionary, by m'lady and it. Started. This. Is just a book saying what chemicals, are in your skincare and it. Wasn't so much the book but how I felt after reading it and it started, making, me question more about what I'm what, products I'm using and, doing more research on that and. That. Made. Me start, to change over my skincare to be more natural and try and eliminate as many toxins, out of my life it's possible, I've, changed, things like my deodorant, to a natural, one my, toothpaste. My. Laundry, detergent, fabric softener. Mint the cleaning, stuff I use so, I've slowly tried, to. Find. Alternatives. And try and eliminate a lot of the toxins and chemicals in, my life and, those. Around me like my husband my dog other, books. Wise, I. Really. Love these I. Tend. To really go for a lot of biographies. I like, to take something away either learn something about someone's life or. Those self-help. Books every now and then I will read a nonfiction story. But. What, I tend to reach for is something fiction, and something that I think a knowledge from this, year I really, got into podcasts. Especially, when I'm at the gym working how I love listening to them and, my. Favorites, for one, for general and like well-being, is definitely coupe I learned so, much from them I love the topics. They cover the people they interview, I always, come, out of listening for a minute feeling really inspired, and like I've gained a lot of knowledge just go into my podcast, the, ATP project, for. Health. And scientific, stuff specifically, their episode on gut health which was recommended, to me by one, of my viewers I, just so really opened my eyes and got me into researching more on gut health and and it's. Now sort of the approach I'm taking to my skin problem, and strictly, for laughs I love the basement, yard joke Santa gato and his friends are so, so funny whenever I turn it on I just, find myself laughing, out loud and it's pretty embarrassing when I'm out in public and just let me be laughing but, yeah, his podcast literally makes me laugh out loud and just feel, happy. Ooh metals, drawers too this. Year Natalie, bought, me metals drawers and I haven't gone back since I used to use, so, much plastic I would take a plastic straw every, single morning sometimes, twice a day to drink my coffee and, whatever, else so, this has strongly, eliminated. My plastic, waste and has. Made. Me want to look into other things and, be more conscious, about how much garbage is plastic, I produce all. Right now I want to watch the video I made last year and reflect, on my goals and see whether I completed, them or not hey everybody happy, new year 2018. Is here and for my first video back I wanted me to reflect on the year I had last year stuff literally. I'm wearing the, same, thing. Like, not, much has changed my. Parents wise besides. The color and length of my hair but I have the same bony tail I'm pretty sure I'm wearing charm and, I'm. Wearing, all of these things that I mentioned that's how you know they're really my favorite I literally started the year wearing them finished, the year wearing them and still continued to wear but. Yeah, not. Much has changed. I. Feel. Like my skin was a little bit better than, me. Arrived in Hong Kong on, December. 31st. So, New Year's Eve we, got. Home around 3:30 in the afternoon, picked up rosy and then unpacked, and we fell asleep as we were so exhausted from travelling and I. Woke up at midnight to the sound of fireworks so I turned on this you know. Pretty. Old saying the same thing I've.
Always Been like this and then I just started crying. I said, this year I didn't even stay up for the countdown I actually mostly, so. There was no tears with that so, some of my lessons I said that the best thing you can be is yourself I, learned. To like be, myself, but. I think one, of to. Expand on that one of my goals for this coming year is to be more. Of myself and, show. More of my authentic, self I think, last, year I tried a little bit to bring up some topics, or discuss my thoughts and I was always scared about what people think or offending, anyone and, this. Year I just really, want to I, want. To open up and get more of myself to you and really, talk, about things I believe in I am a thirty year old woman now I I. Have. Like, my. Opinions, and my thoughts and you guys have grown with me most, of you guys aren't super young you're. You're around my age so, I would like to have more adult, discussion so although I say last year that I found myself and, I, had more self-acceptance, I don't, think I fully gave. That to you and I would like to do more of that next year one of my goals for this year is to get like, a kite, six five six to eight pack maybe that, definitely did not happen and I'm, also okay with that I think. My. Intention, has, changed, a lot and, that. And big part was to do with the surgery, I had I had a big, ovarian, cyst and it was twisted and I had to go through this surgery that was really. Painful and, left. Me unable to exercise, for, a long time and, left me with little scars but. It. Honestly, was a blessing. In disguise because, it. Really changed, the way I think and, my attention feeling the pain I felt and not being able to do things because my body just wasn't able to do it anymore, not being able to go to the gym not having the strength and. Not. Being allowed to go to the gym it, really changed, my thought so now when I go to the gym it's, purely, to just keep, my body healthy and, feel, strong and feel good and I feel a strong connection to, my body like I look at my feet and I'm like oh my god there's one going in front the other I'm running, my heart is racing I can. My body is feeling good I can, feel my muscles burning and wow the feeling, I feel after, I do it I just want to be the healthiest, and strongest version. Of myself and. Feel. Good in my skin I found myself the other day looking, at my closet when I came back from. Canada, and, I realized I kept, a lot of clothes, that I had from.
My When. I was like 20 or and, I always tend to order, the same size like the smaller size jeans are the smallest size and be stuck by like you have to be the smallest size and when I would put, it on and try it on and it didn't fit I would keep it in my closet, and. Say oh I'm gonna I'll. Do whatever it takes to lose. The weight and fit into those jeans I wouldn't buy a bigger, pair of jeans and those jeans have still stayed in my closet and I realized I'm probably never, gonna fit into them again and that's okay because right. Now I have a really good balance and throat, and healthy, relationship, with food and exercise and, I, really just want to feel. Content, and confident, and strong and healthy and this is something that I want to work even more towards, this year I talked, about cooking, more which I. Didn't. Really do stuff. Like my website, I wanted, to revamped, it for some three or what I liked that is, still something I'm saying that I want to do to this day I didn't. Get it done I actually started. Redoing. My website, with. My name but I realized, I want to do something bigger than myself, and I, still don't fully know what that is I have an idea of it but I don't know the name and that's what's holding me back I don't there's. A lot of things I need to figure out but, I definitely really, want to launch a website, this year so. That is something I failed but something I want to still. Try and do next year create. Our dream apartment, we. Did do that it's, not ready yet it guess it's not checked off this is not done it will be checked off next York this year oh, god. I'm feeling it everyone please let me have completed something I really, want to get my driver's license, in Hong Kong get. My driver's, license in Hong Kong nope, I didn't, do that I didn't even start lessons or anything I did, however try. Driving again in Canada in December, where you want to go. Tell. Me where you want to go go. Which, felt really fun, and free, and I love doing it I miss driving I realized that but. Yeah. I still have no plan to get my license here because it's a little bit scary it's the other side of the road I knew, it would be a challenge and I knew when I said it I was like I don't really know if this is gonna happen it would be cool but I still. Don't really know if it's gonna happen and I don't think that is the goal but I think. I really need to have it next year either I don't know it's not really a priority for me so besides what I already talked about another top goal for this year is we. Really want to have a baby and that isn't really something that I can do, myself it's, sort of out of my control I don't know if it's gonna be in the books for us but, if it is that would be amazing so, I guess my goal would be just, to keep my body healthy and, keep my health. Checkups, up to date and just try and create a good environment so that if it happens. Everything, will go smoothly, our home settle into our home here and also. Spend more time in Canada for. That I really need to figure out the rosy situation, because that was torture also me more view in real life in the past I have done meetups, I did one in Hong Kong I did one in Tokyo last. Year I didn't do any at all and I, have. Met many of you guys I was on down the street whether it be in Canada here or wherever I traveled and it's, always it always makes. My day I'm just, talking to you guys hearing. What you have to say hearing a bit about you hugging, you it's. Always amazing so I don't know why I don't do meetups but, it just hasn't happened so I'd love to do one here. In Hong Kong again or wherever I travel and, in, Canada, so, every time I go to Canada you guys always ask me to do a meet-up and I never do one because it's always really rushed it's always a short time it's usually like around Christmas or I'm only home for ten.
Days To two weeks but. Now that I'm going to be spending more time there I would love to meet some of you guys. I need to find like a proper, safe and comfortable setting for it but I'd love to just like hold it discussion, and have a really positive environment. Where we talk about things. Or, maybe, do an activity that's fun together so, I definitely want to do more, meetups this, year and. I'd. Like to try something new maybe study something or, take a new class and just challenge, myself more, and then similar to the foodie videos I'd love to meet more people and, just listen, more and hear more about their stories so I'd love to do more collabs not only with youtubers, but like. Professionals. People that. Are studying, or in different careers. That. We can learn from so I'd love to give more back to you in the sense of a video where you can learn more about stuff, and there's. A lot of different stuff here in Hong Kong the way they do things is very different, so, yeah. I've tucked into the food industry but, I'd like to look into other things be. More conscious of the things I buy and how they will affect me so like I mentioned these things these changes, I'd like to continue to, make and change it make, more changes both for the environment and, myself. And, the people around me rear, wise I want to of course lunch the website hopefully and I. Want. My my upload schedule to, be a vlog. A weekly vlog every. Week hopefully. Unless I take like a week off here and there but pretty, much every, week for the whole year this, year it will be the first year I'll do weekly vlog so, hopefully. It's gonna go well but this is something I, do this year's weekly vlogs and then at least one, ideally, two main, videos a week so that would mean there's two to three videos a week every, week that's, it I think I've touched on everything I reflected, on the past year talked about what. Has changed talked about failing every goal I set but, that's okay because a lot of my focus has, has, changed I don't know if I'm just making up an excuse for not actually doing it but. Yeah. I don't know I've. Told you the goals I want to do for this year I hope, you've had some time to reflect on your past year and think about the things that you really want to do for this year let me know in the comments, what they may be so, we can talk about them and. Yeah. I, thank. You so much for watching I, hope you have a really healthy, and successful.
Whatever. That may mean to you happy. 2019. And I. Will see you guys in my next video I really got a new. He's gonna yell at me we, gotta go to our new houses have a meeting I'm, coming I'm coming I'm ending you right now thank. You guys watching.